The Mysterious Masquerade
by pingo1387
Summary: Usopp was already head-over-heels for the King, but it's an invitation to the masquerade ball and a shocking revelation from his housemate that really turn his life upside-down. SanUso, side Saboala, based on "Cinderella."
1. That's the End of Another Day

**I was gonna wait a while longer before publishing this, but fuck it, right? We'll be updating Mondays!**

* * *

Usopp gathered up his easel, double thick sheets, and paints, awkwardly holding everything in his arms. He'd sold two paintings that day, and if the numerous artworks decorating the walls were anything to go by, this was quite a success.

"Want some help?"

"No way!" he declared, glancing to the smiling young woman who leaned against the counter from her side. "I'm the strongest man in the world, Koala! There's no way I couldn't handle this—!"

Something struck his cheek and he shrieked, dropping his burden.

"You sure about that?" muttered the man sitting on the barstool, who had used a straw to shoot a pebble at him. He was tawny and muscled, his short hair an odd spring-green and his clothes never neat.

"Leave me alone," Usopp mumbled, kneeling to gather his things. "That wasn't a fair fight, Zoro . . . I want a rematch . . ."

"If you really want a rematch, you should have more resolve about it," Zoro remarked, standing and heading over to help him out. He did not have far to walk; Koala's tavern was rather small compared to others in town, and though she received few customers throughout the day, business was good enough for her to stay open. Zoro's presence likely helped with this, for he always arrived as soon as the place opened and stayed until it closed.

"Thanks," Usopp said resignedly as he and Zoro got the supplies to the back room and placed them in a corner. Zoro grunted in response and went back to his stool. As Usopp went to the counter, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror behind it—bronze-skinned, long-nosed, curly-haired, and quite thin compared to Zoro.

"Honestly, are you getting enough to eat at home?" Koala asked, placing a hand on her cheek. With her looks, it was surprising they didn't get more customers: her creamy complexion, pageboy strawberry-blonde hair, frilly clothes, and round eyes fit together to make quite the picture.

"Of course!" Usopp lied with a grin. "And I'll have you know I once went forty days and forty nights without eating a thing!"

"Oh, is that so?" Zoro muttered without looking at him.

"Hey!"

Koala smiled. "Well, if you're sure . . ."

She disappeared into the back room and returned clutching a few bills in one hand and a baguette in the other.

"Weekly payment, and here's some bread for the road," she announced.

"Thanks very much," Usopp said with a grateful grin. He carefully folded up the bills, which went into his pocket, while the bread was held almost reverently in one hand.

"Tell your wife I said hi," Zoro said idly.

"Wife?" Usopp repeated. "Wh—oh. Come on, she's my friend. Just 'cause we live together doesn't mean we're _together_ —"

"Yeah, just teasing." Zoro grinned. "See you tomorrow."

"Have a good night," Koala added, making Zoro lift his mug so she could wipe the counter underneath. Usopp waved farewell with the bread before pushing his way through the door and out to the street.

Usopp eyed the bread hungrily as he walked, but forced himself not to take a bite before he got home. As a horse-drawn carriage passed by, he frantically flung his arm up, holding it out of harm's way as the wheels splashed up some mud. He shook off the dirt with a sigh and continued on his way.

He reached his house at last and pushed open the door, stepping in and shutting it gently behind him as he kicked off his muddy boots. Creeping into the small parlor, he grinned and approached the sleeping figure on the couch.

"Hey, Nami! Wake up!"

Nami's eyes flew open and she sat up, almost knocking into Usopp, her longish orange hair disheveled and her shirt a crinkled mess.

"Usopp," she exclaimed, seeing him and holding a scowl on her pale face among the freckles. "I've told you before, don't surprise me so!"

Usopp grinned and held up the bread and money. "Happy Saturday!"

Nami eyed the money. "I forgive you. Give that to me, I'll put it in the safe. Go on and start dinner."

"Yes, ma'am," Usopp replied with a mock salute. Nami stuck out her tongue at him and headed away while Usopp took the bread to the kitchen.

He sliced it up into even parts and checked the fridge. To his surprise, it hadn't changed from that morning—there was still a lone pickle, three olives floating in a jar, and a bottle of hot sauce.

Usopp sighed and took out the hot sauce and olives. As he did so, he noticed a scrap of paper stuck to the bottle, which held three stanzas of scribbled poetry, reading:

 _If I can stop one heart from breaking,  
I shall not live in vain;  
If I can ease one life the aching,  
Or cool one pain,  
Or help one fainting sparrow  
Unto his nest again,  
I shall not live in vain. _

" _The time might come," the Walrus said,  
_ " _To talk of many things:  
Of shoes—and ships—and sealing-wax—  
Of cabbages—and kings—  
And why the sea is boiling-hot—  
And whether pigs have wings." _

_We have the blanket, just we three,  
The robin, and I, and the sweet cherry-tree;  
The bird told the tree, and the tree told me,  
And nobody knows it but just us three. _

"Nami?" he said, turning around as Nami came back. He held up the bottle. "What's with the poems?"

Nami shrugged. "I found that sticking in the window today; the wind probably blew it there. I like those stanzas, so I kept it."

Usopp turned the paper back around. "Huh. These are all different poems. Anyway, did you eat today?"

"How do you think I can eat when that's all we have?" Nami demanded. "If that thief hadn't come and knocked everything around and taken the food, maybe I would've had time to eat, but I've been busy trying to clean the house without collapsing!"

"You did a good job with that," Usopp remarked. "No one would know someone broke in. At least I chased the guy off."

"By screaming and scaring them away, yes," Nami added. She sighed. "Let's have some food. We have enough saved up so you can visit the store tomorrow."

"You wanna come?" Usopp asked, slicing up the olives and spreading them out on the bread slices.

Nami folded her arms. "No thank you. I will stay right here."

"Come on," Usopp wheedled, squirting hot sauce on his bread. "I'll take you to meet Franky and Chopper! They're really cool!"

"I will not go," Nami insisted, sitting at the table as Usopp handed her a plate with her share. "We have been over this."

"Okay, okay, sorry."

Nami took a bite of her bread. "How did work go today?"

"Pretty good, actually," Usopp said, grinning. "I sold two paintings! And Zoro says hi."

"Two paintings? That is wonderful!" Nami exclaimed. "Keep up the good work, understand?"

"I can't _make_ people buy my paintings," Usopp protested. "I get tipped sometimes just for being nice, and Koala pays me to decorate the walls, but I can't control what someone likes . . ."

"Perhaps you should be pushing more," Nami suggested, finishing one slice and standing to get water from the sink. "Just like your usual stories—'Oh, this is a painting of a castle I visited in a faraway land, and their princess has asked to marry me—'"

"Hey, my stories are better than that," Usopp said as if hurt. "And I don't have to go to a faraway land if I wanna visit a castle; we don't live too far from King Sanji."

Nami folded her arms as she sat at the table again. "You'd have to request an audience with him to do that."

"Well, that's true." Usopp propped his head up on his hands. "It'd be nice to meet him one day, but I guess that's not an appropriate reason to request a . . . _royal_ visit."

He rolled the R as he said this, making Nami laugh.

"He seems easygoing, but you are right," she said, smiling. "Do you want to play cards after supper?"

Usopp frowned. "As long as you don't cheat."

"I do _not_ cheat."

"I caught you taping a mirror to the wall last time!"

"That was for something else!"

* * *

Usopp bade Nami farewell, and she promised to dust the house while he was at the supermarket.

"Let's see," he muttered, reading her list as he went down the aisle with the shopping cart. "Dairy stuff, meat, veggies . . ."

He frowned.

"Why does she always put mushrooms on there?" he muttered. "I don't get how anyone could like them . . ."

He sighed and stowed the list in his pocket.

* * *

"Well, well, if it isn't our old friend . . . why don't you stop right there, pal?"

Usopp froze at the gravelly, unfamiliar voice. He'd been heading home under the cloudy sky when the voice had stopped him in the middle of the street.

"What do you want?" he whispered, his voice coming out as a squeak, the few bags of food on his arms shaking with his limbs. "I don't have money, please don't take my food, I'm hungry, I need this to live—I'll have you know I have eight thousand subordinates hiding around here, if you so much lift a finger against me they'll jump you in half a second—"

"We took them all out," another voice whispered.

Usopp gulped. "D—Did you?"

"Are you prepared to go the same way as them?" the first voice whispered. "If not . . . you'd _better get ready!"_

Usopp shrieked as another hand clamped on his other shoulder and spun him around. The bags nearly hit him in the face as his arms flew up protectively.

"Usopp?"

He slowly lowered his arms, eyes wide, and found himself facing two familiar figures. The one on his left was a head shorter than him, with acorn skin, doe eyes, and a pink top hat. The one directly in front of him, huge hands on his shoulders and skin like desert sand, was two feet taller, barrel-chested, and wearing short-shorts and sunglasses on his forehead. His blue hair was styled in a ducktail and his nose and limbs were made of metal to varying lengths nearing the torso.

"Franky?" Usopp exclaimed. "Chopper?"

Franky released his shoulders with a grin. "Did we scare you?" he asked, dropping the gravelly tone.

Chopper covered his mouth, giggling. "Sorry! It was too tempting!"

"Too tempting, my foot, you didn't have to do any of that!" Usopp exclaimed, grinning despite himself. "How've you guys been?"

"Pretty super," Franky declared, raising his arms above his head and bending one knee. Dropping the pose, he continued, "Had to fix a telegram and a carriage wheel today . . . plus a busted-up radio. Looked like someone hit it with a car."

"And Franky's limbs almost rusted up again," Chopper added. "So I had to oil them for him. Again."

"Hey, shut up," Franky said indignantly. "He doesn't need to know that—"

"Come on, I've said it before, you should be more careful!" Usopp exclaimed, looking over Franky's joints. "You need those things!"

"I'm fine," Franky insisted. "I can always count on Chopper to help in an emergency, anyway!"

Chopper grinned and wriggled in place. "Don't you compliment me like that!" he said in delight. "I absolutely hate it!"

"Right, right," Franky said, patting his shoulder. "Usopp, bro, how's life?"

"Well, if you ignore being assaulted by so-called _friends_ . . ."

Franky grinned. "Hey, we said sorry!"

Usopp laughed. "Right. Anyway, a thief broke into our house the other day—everything's fine!" he added hastily at Chopper's expression. "They got away with most of the food, but I bravely chased them away before they could crack the safe!"

"Oh, so they got scared by your screaming and ran," Franky said, nodding in understanding. "Too bad about the food. Need any help?"

"No, we're fine," Usopp said reassuringly. "We just gotta spend a little more this week, that's all."

"How about Nami?" Chopper asked. "D'you think we could meet her soon?"

Usopp grinned apologetically. "No, sorry. Maybe another time."

"What if we just, y'know, casually dropped in for a visit?" Franky suggested.

"Don't," Usopp exclaimed. "She panicked last time I asked her about visitors."

"Maybe one day, then," Chopper said determinedly. "Hey, do you wanna hang out at the workshop for a little bit?"

Usopp shook his head. "Sorry—I gotta put this stuff away, and then it's work time. Maybe tomorrow morning?"

"Hey, yeah," Franky said, holding up a hand. Usopp awkwardly high-fived him, wincing when his hand hit metal. "See you then!"

Usopp waved goodbye and turned to head home.

* * *

The rest of the day passed much like the previous one. Monday morning found Usopp helping Franky and Chopper in the workshop, while the afternoon was once again spent in the tavern, painting and occasionally chatting with Koala or a patron. He was lucky once more when Brook, a skeleton-thin, copper-skinned, and afroed man, and a customer nearly as regular as Zoro, decided to purchase one of Usopp's paintings.

"I've had my eye on it for quite some time," he'd admitted with a chuckle, taking down the illustration of a whale pod in the open sea.

But it was Tuesday that a most unusual customer arrived at the tavern.


	2. That's Unusual!

Tuesday had begun quite normally for Usopp. He had woken before noon, talked with Nami for a time, joined Franky and Chopper in their shop,  
("You know what I learned the other day?" Franky had said. "The Japanese word for 'sniper' is 'sogeki.' Sounds cool, right?")  
and then headed off to the tavern, already with a few customers at the counter.

Usopp had finished a painting he'd started the other day, one of a brig sloop with a lion figurehead, which somehow complemented a previous work of a caravel with a sheep figurehead. By the time he hung this one on the wall near the other ship painting, the customers of the bar had all vanished but Zoro and Brook.

"You know, Mr. Usopp," Brook said with a delicate sip of his milk (how odd it was, that he would visit a tavern only to order milk each time!), "if we don't meet this Miss Nami you live with, I'll have to start thinking you've invented her!"

Usopp laughed. "I promise she's real, Brook, she's just shy! Maybe one day. I'd like to paint a portrait of her, actually, but she probably wouldn't appreciate—"

They fell silent as the door to the tavern swung open and someone about Zoro's height, their face obscured by a cloak, strode inside, pausing only to return and make sure the door shut properly. The person approached the counter and sat at the bar.

"May I have a small glass of wine?" they asked. Judging by the voice, it was a man.

"Coming up," Koala said, raising an eyebrow and smirking. "Red or white?"

"Red, please."

Koala ducked into the back room and came back out with a dusty bottle, which she quickly gave a rinse before popping out the cork. As she poured a small glass and passed it to the stranger, Zoro and Brook eyed the man apprehensively.

"Thank you," the man said, taking a sip. Usopp watched him curiously from his place, the canvas still blank before him.

"If you don't mind, why are you hiding yourself?" Koala asked bluntly. "This place isn't as popular as the other bar, and you aren't a regular."

The man set his glass down. "In all honesty, I just came upon this place by chance. And, er . . . the guards have likely been sent after me by now, and I'd surely cause a stir if I showed my face."

"Are you a wanted man?" Koala said suspiciously. "I'll tell you right now, I won't tolerate any crime in this place."

"Shall I kick him out?" Zoro offered. He and Brook stood.

"No, no, I'll handle him," Koala said, waving a hand, and they sat again.

"Are you sure you don't want the help of the strongest man in the world?" Usopp asked, speaking up at last. The man turned slightly to him and Koala smiled.

"I think the strongest _woman_ in the world can handle it," she said kindly.

"Okay, then! I believe in you!" Usopp declared, more than happy to let his claim go unproven.

"Now then, sir, I'll have to ask you to leave or I'll turn you over to those guards myself," Koala said to the stranger.

The stranger sighed. "I'm not a criminal, I can promise you that."

"You're mighty suspicious nonetheless," Zoro muttered.

"Who are you calling suspicious?" the man demanded, turning to Zoro so sharply that his hood fell off, revealing smooth blonde hair combed over one blue eye, a very neat goatee, a scowl, and an eyebrow oddly curled into a spiral at the outside end.

"Oh my, oh my, what's this?" Brook exclaimed. "You wouldn't be our King Sanji?"

Usopp's and Koala's eyes widened, while Zoro's narrowed.

"Oh, er," Sanji said, leaning back awkwardly, "yes."

"Sir—Your Majesty, that is—" Koala exclaimed, flustered. "Why in the world are the guards after you?"

Sanji grinned. "I snuck outside and left a note. They've surely been sent to fetch me by now, that's all."

"Well, I know this is a small kingdom, but I didn't think the King himself would gallivant around the village," Zoro remarked. "Honestly, what kind of ruler do we have?"

"One who could have you arrested once the guards show up," Sanji threatened, though it was clear he was joshing. He turned back to his wine and took another sip.

"Thank you for coming, Sire," Koala said, relaxing at last. "To have someone of your caliber visit . . ."

"I'm not that important," Sanji said reassuringly, giving her a smile. "Really, I don't need special treatment or anything of the sort; and this is a lovely place besides."

He looked around, taking in the paintings.

"Your name, my dear?" he asked absently.

"Koala."

"What a pretty name . . . and what pretty paintings! Did you make them yourself?"

Koala smiled. "I'll have to defer credit to Usopp on that one." She gestured to Usopp sitting in the corner, and Sanji looked over in surprise.

"A painter?" he said, standing and approaching. Usopp stared in surprise as he sat next to him. "You did all these yourself?"

"Y—Yes, Your Majesty," Usopp said quickly. "They're for sale, if you'd like."

He groaned and covered his face. How could he say such a thing to the King?

"I'd love one."

Usopp looked up. Sanji stood and pointed to a painting of an ocean filled with fish. "How much for this one?"

Usopp told him.

"I'll take it," Sanji said. He reached into his pocket, took out a small handful of money, and handed it to Usopp, who counted it out and started to hand back the extra.

"No, no, keep the change, you deserve it," Sanji insisted. He gently removed the painting from the wall, ignoring Usopp's sputtering, before going back to the bar to return to his drink. Usopp watched him in awe as he slowly pocketed the money.

"Oh, forgive me—your name?" Sanji added, turning back to Usopp as he set the painting gently on the counter.

"U—Usopp!"

Sanji quirked a smile. "Very nice. And you two?" he said, glancing at Zoro and Brook.

They introduced themselves, and Zoro scowled. "Are your guards coming for you soon?"

"Does my face irritate you or something?" Sanji demanded. "I'll have you know yours isn't so grand either—"

"I won't stand for fighting, now," Koala said sternly. Zoro backed down and Sanji gave her a sheepish look.

"Hey, pardon the intrusion! Is King Sanji here?"

The doors swung open and three people came in, wearing fancy coats and hats. They appeared to be young men.

"Ah, here you are," said one with rosy skin, freckles, and messy dark hair.

"Ah," Sanji muttered. "How did you find me?"

"Robin told us where you were," said the second one, who had a fair complexion, wavy hair, and a jagged scar on the left side of his face.

"She's too smart for me," Sanji said despondently. "She always knows where I am."

"Hi! I like your hair!" the third one exclaimed, staring at Zoro. This one had a mop of dark hair, a bright smile, and a scar under his left eye. "And yours!" he added, now looking at Brook.

"Uh . . . thanks," Zoro said. "You three are the guards?"

Brook chuckled. "Ah, it seems so, doesn't it? Thank you, sir . . ."

"Hi, I'm Ace," the freckled one said. He gestured to the blonde one and the bedhead. "Sabo, Luffy."

They said hello, and Sabo glanced at Koala. She noticed him staring and raised an eyebrow, and he quickly looked away.

"C'mon, now, Sire," Ace said sternly. He yawned. "Robin's going to be strict with you if you dally."

"I'm the King," Sanji muttered petulantly. "Should be able to stay out if I want."

Nonetheless, he stood, grabbing his purchased painting. "Thank you for your hospitality," he added to Koala, placing some money on the counter for the wine.

"Come back anytime," Koala said pleasantly. Sabo glanced at her again with a nervous smile, and she gave him one back this time. His eyes widened and he looked away.

As the guards led him out the door, Sanji gave a nod to Zoro and Brook and a bright smile to Usopp, who could only stare as the doors swung shut behind them.

"That was one of the weirdest things to happen since I opened this place," Koala said at last.

"So that was King Sanji," Brook murmured, sipping his milk.

"Usopp, you okay?" Zoro said. Usopp was still staring at the doors.

"Uh—yeah! Just surprised!" Usopp exclaimed, returning to his canvas only to find it still blank.

"You can head out if you like," Koala said. "You sold a painting to the King himself. I'd say that makes for a pretty successful day."

"Oh, thanks!" Usopp said. He stood, nearly knocking over his things, and began putting them away.

* * *

"Hey, Nami!" Usopp exclaimed as he strode into the parlor. "You'll never guess what happened!"

Nami jumped and looked up from where she'd been reading on the couch. "For goodness' sake, Usopp, don't startle me like that," she said in annoyance.

"We've been living together for three months, how much longer are you going to be startled when I come in?" Usopp muttered, sitting across from her.

"It's only bad when you make so much _noise_ , it just surprises me," Nami said quickly, closing her book. "So, what happened?"

Usopp grinned. "King Sanji himself came to the tavern!"

Nami's eyes widened. "The _King?"_

"Yeah! He bought one of my paintings!"

"You didn't mention me to him, did you?"

Usopp frowned. "No? Why?"

"Nothing." Nami forced a smile. "He bought one of your paintings, huh?"

Usopp dug out the money and showed her proudly.

"That's great!" she cried, her smile now genuine. "Go leave that by the safe, I'll put it in later!"

She looked up again. "Why was he there?"

"I think he just wanted to be in town, but it seems he left without telling anyone and the guards came after him," Usopp explained.

Nami rested her head on a hand. "What is he like?"

"He seems really carefree," Usopp said thoughtfully. "And . . . um. He's very pretty."

"Oh?" Nami raised an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

"Well, he _is—_ "

Nami grinned and stood. "I'll get dinner started."

* * *

The following day began much the same. Usopp hung out with Franky and Chopper in their workshop, and laughed when Franky complained that carriage drivers should know where the potholes are by now so they don't break things running into them, and _how_ could someone spill so many crumbs into the _earpiece_ of a telephone?

The tavern scene, too, was much the same. Usopp started a new painting, which would surely be finished by the time his work day ended, and as the sun began to set, customers began to disperse, leaving only Zoro at the bar.

And, as before, a hooded man entered, this time with a companion.

"It's raining today," Sanji remarked, throwing off his hood and shaking water droplets from his bangs. He and Sabo went and sat at the bar.

"Is this going to be a regular thing?" Koala asked with an amused smile.

"Maybe," Sanji admitted. "May I have a brandy?"

Koala nodded and turned to Sabo. "And for you?"

"Oh, uh . . ." Sabo bit his lip and awkwardly brushed his hair over his scar. "Just water."

Koala nodded and busied herself getting the drinks. Sanji glanced at Zoro, and finding that he was ignoring him completely, scowled and looked at Usopp with a smile. Usopp quickly lowered his head and continued painting.

"I did ask to leave this time," Sanji added to Koala. "My advisor let me go on the condition I would have a chaperone."

"I see," Koala said, glancing at Sabo again. She gave them their drinks, and Sanji paid for them before standing and heading over to Usopp. Sabo stayed at the bar, drinking his water slowly and staying awkwardly silent.

"May I watch?"

Usopp looked up at Sanji at last. "Uh, sure! I mean, yes, Your Majesty—um—" He stood, ran to one of the small tables, and grabbed one of its chairs, bringing it over and setting it next to him. "Here!"

"Thank you," Sanji said, seating himself with Usopp. Usopp picked up his brush again and continued his work.

"That painting I bought yesterday," Sanji said. "It looks very good on the wall."

"D—Does it? I'm glad," Usopp murmured, staring determinedly at the canvas. Today he was painting a beautiful snow-covered island, with odd drum-shaped mountains. On the top of one was an enormous cherry tree in full bloom.

"Er . . . I can go?"

"Uh, you don't have to," Usopp said quickly, voice cracking on the last word. He lowered his paintbrush and his head, trying to ignore the warmth of the body right next to him.

When he looked up again, Sanji was smiling.

"So," Koala said to Sabo, "those two from before, they're not with you today?"

Sabo looked up in surprise and shook his head. "They're my brothers," he explained. "His Majesty needed an escort, and I volunteered."

"Brothers . . . and you were all hired at the same time?"

Sabo smiled. "What happened was, we were at our place, talking about how to get more money, and King Sanji burst inside with his advisor and asked if we wanted jobs. We live at the castle now."

"That little one looked too scrawny to be a guard," Zoro remarked, spinning his glass on the counter.

Sabo stood and stalked over to Zoro. "You got something bad to say about him?" he asked with a dark look.

"I'm saying he's skinny," Zoro muttered, glancing up. "Guards usually look stronger. I'm not saying he's not stro—"

Sabo cracked his knuckles. "He can defend himself," he said dangerously. "But he's not here, so I'll have to do that for him. Why don't you stand up?"

Koala sighed, walked to the other end of the bar, and lifted up that part of the counter, coming around to the outside and heading to Sabo and Zoro.

"I won't have fighting here," she announced.

Sabo glanced behind him. "Oh! Sorr—"

She spun him around by the shoulder, bent down, and, despite that he was nearly a foot taller, lifted him up by the legs, slinging him over her shoulder. Ignoring his protests, she carried him out the door and dumped him onto the road, heading back inside while dusting off her hands.

"I could've handled him," Zoro muttered.

"Yes, you could've," Koala said kindly. "But I won't tolerate fistfights in here, and I didn't want to have to throw you out as well." She glanced over to where Sanji was peering around the canvas next to a rather flustered Usopp. "Sorry, Your Majesty."

"It's fine," Sanji said reassuringly. He downed the rest of his brandy, coughed, and stood. "Maybe that's our cue to leave." He set his glass on the bar counter. "Thank you again."

He gave a smile to Koala, and then one to Usopp. Throwing on his hood again, he headed out to get Sabo to come back to the castle with him.

"Did you notice his hair's really nice?" Usopp murmured.

Zoro and Koala shot him amused looks.

"What?" Usopp exclaimed defensively.

* * *

Upon Usopp's arrival home, he told Nami of Sanji's second visit. She was only mildly surprised this time, and, like Zoro and Koala, easily saw Usopp's fascination with him.

Over the week, it became a regular thing. Sanji would visit the tavern in the evening, accompanied by one of his guards (Sabo apologized for being violent and seemed to take a great interest in Koala, Ace would often fall asleep at the bar, being a narcoleptic, and Luffy would chat up a storm with Zoro or Usopp). Sanji occasionally sat with Usopp, watching him paint, and sometimes even asked him about what he was doing, to which Usopp gave high-pitched responses.

"Um, Nami," he said one evening. "Do you know what . . . having a crush is like?"

Nami covered her mouth, shaking with laughter.

"What?!"

"You are so transparent," she exclaimed, smiling.

"I don't know what you mean," he said stubbornly.

"If you insist."

Luckily, Usopp was able to work this out on his own.

The day following, King Sanji did not visit the bar.

"Oh, he must be preparing for the party," Koala remarked.

"Party?" Usopp repeated.

"You'll find out when you're home," Zoro said.

When Usopp came back home, he found a letter stuck in the door crack. Frowning, he pulled it out, opened the door, and stepped inside.

"Nami?" he called. "Did someone stop by today?"

Nami came out of the parlor. "Someone knocked on the door," she admitted, "but I didn't want to get it."

Usopp rolled his eyes. "Okay. It's just a letter."

"Letter?"

"Yeah," Usopp said, ripping the paper from the wax seal. "Let's see . . ."

He held it out so he and Nami could read it.

"A masquerade ball held by King Sanji?" Nami said.

"In three days," Usopp said, lifting his eyebrows. "At the castle . . . and the whole kingdom's invited!"

"Can the whole kingdom fit inside the castle, I wonder?" Nami murmured.

"I'm sure not everyone's going, and this kingdom's pretty small," Usopp reminded her. "But . . ."

"Would you . . . like to attend?"

Usopp glanced to her in surprise. "Me?" He sighed. "Well, sure, I'd _like_ to! I would dazzle everyone there with my splendor . . . if only I had something nice to wear, or even a mask, and I don't have either." He folded up the letter again. "What about you? Wouldn't you like to go?"

Nami shuddered. "Certainly not. I would not feel safe there."

"If you say so."

Nami stepped away into the parlor in silent thought.

* * *

Days passed, and the time of the ball arrived. Koala had closed the bar early, and Usopp had startled Nami with his early return.

"Are you okay?" he asked, noticing she was fidgeting and pacing. "Are you hungry? I can start dinner—"

"Usopp," she said. "What time is the ball beginning?"

"It's starting pretty soon, people are already going, I think," Usopp said with a sigh. "Why?"

"You want to go, don't you?"

"What—of course I do! But I told you, I don't—"

Nami folded her arms. "Listen, I know you have a crush on King Sanji."

Usopp's eyes widened. "Um—"

"Don't act like you don't know what I mean, we both know it's true!"

Usopp sagged in defeat. "Okay, you're right! But he's _royalty,_ how could I have a chance with that?! And what does that have to do with this?!"

"I have . . . an idea," Nami said, hesitating. "I could get you to that ball, and if this all works out, we can both benefit."

Usopp raised a hand. "Um. Please be more specific. You're confusing me."

Nami strode out of the room. Usopp folded his arms, waiting, and she returned a minute later, holding a thin white rod.

He eyed it. "A stick?"

Nami took a deep breath, clenching the rod between her fingers. "You're going to the ball," she said. "And see if you can't get a dance with King Sanji. But you have to promise not to tell a single soul about this."

"I don't know what you mean!" Usopp protested. "I promise, I guess?"

Nami grabbed his arm and walked him to the bathroom, where a mirror hung above the sink.

"Okay," she murmured. "I know what to do here . . ."

She stepped back, raised the rod, and twirled it over Usopp. "Bibidi . . . babidi . . . buu!"

The air shimmered and sparkled above and around Usopp, and he froze in surprise.

"Sa-la-mee-goo-da, se-la-ree-chi-lee, bibidi, babidi, buu!"

Usopp blinked, stared at himself in the mirror, and shrieked. His clothes had been replaced by a fine ruffled suit fit for a prince, complete with a fancy red cape hanging over his back, and a Venetian mask covering his face. The mask was decorated in yellow and blue, had two holes for the eyes (and one for his long nose to stick through) covered in dark glass, three sunflower-like decorations sticking out from the top and sides, and carved lips covering the lower face.

"What is this?!" he yelled, feeling his hair, which had been neatly tied back. "Hey, where did my ears go?!"

Nami gripped his shoulders. "Remember . . . you promised . . . you wouldn't tell."

Usopp turned around. "I think you have some explaining to do! This is the weirdest thing! And where are my ears?! I can still hear, but—?!"

"It's just a side . . . effect. Get to the door . . ."

Nami held onto his shoulders, guiding him slowly to the door.

"As long as . . . you don't tell anyone . . . who you are," she said, "or remove . . . the mask, no one . . . will recognize you."

"I—!"

"The costume will disappear . . . at midnight," she interrupted. "Get out of sight . . . before it does."

"Nami?!"

Nami smiled. "See if . . . you can't win over . . . the King. Go have fun."

Usopp stared at her. "I still don't get it!" he exclaimed. "But . . . okay! I will! You better explain when I get back!"

"I do owe you . . . that much."

Usopp turned to the door, opened it, and waved as he left the house.

Nami waited until the door was shut before she staggered into the parlor and passed out on the couch.


	3. Be Cool at the Club

Usopp went down the street, clutching the letter in hand, and slipped in among the crowds and the carriages and the occasional bicycle, all moving in the direction of the castle to join the masquerade ball. Many folk already wore masks (some full-face like Usopp's, some only covering the top half), but some had yet to put one on. The sun had already sunk below the horizon, and the street was lit by street lamps and torches.

Though Usopp stayed silent as he walked, he was quite tense underneath his disguise, and his thoughts raced a mile a minute. Nami could use magic? Magic was real? How would going to the ball benefit them both? Would he be able to meet Sanji? Surely _someone_ would recognize him with his nose sticking out like a sore thumb?

Before he knew it, he was standing at the foot of the castle's front stairs, and the man was holding out his hand impatiently for the invitation. Usopp hastily handed over the letter and cautiously went up the stairs, slowly entering through the doors.

The room before him was a sight to behold. A murmur of conversation echoed off the ceiling, from which hung a gorgeous glass chandelier. People filled the floor, many at the buffet table serving themselves food and drink, many mingling in clusters. A band played in the corner, and to Usopp's surprise, he spotted Brook playing along with his violin.

At the far end of the room were two thrones; only one was occupied, and it was by King Sanji himself. He had parted his hair down the center for the occasion, revealing asymmetrical curly eyebrows. Next to him stood a woman with fallow skin and dark, silken hair. The guards Ace, Sabo, and Luffy stood nearby, each eyeing the celebration (and the buffet table) hopefully.

Usopp eyed Sanji a moment more, but it looked as though he would not join the party just yet, so he instead mixed himself in with the crowd. He began making a beeline for the buffet table, wondering if he could bring some food back home, but his path was abruptly blocked by someone.

"Oh, pardon me!" he and the person exclaimed at the same time. The person turned to him with a nervous smile, her eyes decorated with a pretty mask and her long blue hair pulled into a bun; a choker covered her neck. Over chestnut skin, she wore a pale gold gown with an open front, a wide bodice, and long, ruffled, open sleeves.

"I am very sorry," she said again. She eyed Usopp, and her eyes widened, taking in his appearance. "You are . . . this is . . . ?"

Usopp cleared his throat. "I'm sorry?"

The girl hesitated. "I . . . no, it's nothing. Forgive me."

She hurried away into the crowd. Usopp frowned and turned back to the buffet table, this time reaching it. He took an aqueous martini and a small ceviche, and when he turned away, he came face-to-face with someone familiar.

"Koala!" he exclaimed.

She smiled. "Hello." For the occasion, she wore a feathered domino mask and a red dress ending just above her knees, straps hanging from her shoulders and pretty frills decorating the outfit.

"Do I know you?" she added.

Usopp's eyebrows shot up. "She was right," he muttered to himself. He cleared his throat. "Er . . . I'm afraid not."

"But you knew my name . . . did someone tell you?"

"I have telepathic abilities," Usopp said in a hushed voice.

Koala giggled. "Is that so? Well, Mr. Psychic, what's your name?"

Usopp cleared his throat. "I'm afraid my identity must remain a secret," he said, swishing his cape around.

"Really? Well, that's too bad." Koala tilted her head. "I do wonder, though . . . you seem to remind me of someone I know, but I can't think of who or why . . . I guess it's not important." She glanced in the direction of Sanji. "I don't suppose you know when King Sanji and his guards will be joining the dance?"

"So they _will_ be joining!" Usopp exclaimed in relief. "And uh, no, sorry."

Koala eyed him in amusement.

"Well, I hope you have fun, Mr. Psychic," she said, turning away with a wave.

"Uh, yeah," Usopp said, too late. "You too."

He wandered amongst the crowd, nibbling on his food. When he made his way past the buffet table again, he quietly stuffed some food into his pockets.

A while passed, and he found two very familiar figures: A large man in big blue robe, wearing a full-face mask not unlike Usopp's; and a much shorter figure with a long pink skirt, a ruffled pink shirt, a pink top hat, and a full-face mask.

"Franky!" Usopp exclaimed. "Chopper! Hey, you guys are here!"

Franky and Chopper glanced at each other.

"Have we met?" Franky asked, lifting his mask to better peer at Usopp with suspicion.

"I like your outfit," Chopper said in wonder, staring up at Usopp with shining eyes.

Usopp gulped and took a step back. "Um . . . no, we haven't met," he mumbled to Franky. "Sorry. My mistake."

"You called us by name," Franky said, eyes narrowing.

"I'm psychic."

"You are?!" Chopper exclaimed, taking off his mask. "That's amazing! Who are you?!"

Usopp coughed. "My identity cannot be revealed, young Chopper . . ."

"A secret agent?!"

"Now see here," Franky said, placing a massive hand on Usopp's shoulder. "You're mighty suspicious, and you remind me of someone I know, but I can't for the life of me think who it might be. So are you going to tell us who you are, or do we have to take this outside?" He eyed Usopp a moment more. "Where are your ears? Were you in an accident?"

Usopp gulped. "I . . . I promised I wouldn't tell anyone my name," he mumbled. "And don't worry about the ear thing. I'm sorry . . ."

"Franky, he's a _secret agent,_ " Chopper exclaimed, pulling Franky's arm down from Usopp's shoulder. "He's gotta stay undercover!"

Franky glanced at Chopper and reluctantly backed away from Usopp. "Fine," he grumbled. "But if you try anything, Mr. Suspicious—"

"I haven't done anything!" Usopp protested.

"Franky, let's get more food," Chopper insisted. "Bye, cool guy!"

He pulled Franky away, giving Usopp a chance to duck back into the crowds. Usopp spotted Zoro hanging out near the buffet table and decided to avoid another confrontation.

But . . . it was rather lonely, being treated like a stranger by such close friends.

* * *

Time flew by, and it was only three hours to midnight when Sanji stood from his throne.

"Everything's going so well," he remarked to the woman next to him. He glanced at Ace sleeping against the wall and decided not to comment.

"Indeed," the woman murmured, smoothing out her suit. "Our young charge seems to be having fun, as well."

Sanji smiled. "How wonderful. I'm about ready to join in, myself."

"Your guards are, too."

"Oh, of course, I won't make them stay back." Sanji stretched and eyed the crowd. "You know, Robin . . . I do hope Usopp came tonight."

Robin smiled. "The painter you're so fond of?"

Sanji looked to the ceiling. "What do you mean by 'fond?'"

"You know what I mean, Sire."

Sanji smiled. "Well, guilty as charged." He tapped Luffy's and Sabo's shoulders. "Hey, you two, we're joining in. Go on."

They grinned and hurried into the crowd without a word. Sanji followed close behind, and people parted for him when they realized he was coming.

It didn't take Usopp long to notice him, but, wary of his royal presence, he hung back shyly, keeping behind other visitors. He noticed that while Sanji politely greeted everyone he came across, especially women, he seemed to be looking for someone in particular.

Who could it be?

Usopp kept out of the way while Sanji mingled with the crowd, occasionally offering a dance to a pretty lady, though it never lasted long. During this time, Usopp spotted Luffy hounding the buffet table, and Sabo and Koala finding each other—Sabo offered a dance, and Koala pretended to think about it before accepting.

At last, not long after the clock chimed eleven times, Sanji spotted Usopp.

He approached him after only a moment's hesitation, and Usopp froze in place.

"Pardon me," Sanji said. "Do I know you from somewhere, sir?"

"I don't believe so, Your Majesty," Usopp said, swallowing nervously.

"Really." Sanji raised an eyebrow. "You remind me of someone . . . I can't think of who, but . . ."

He placed a hand to his chin, staring at Usopp thoughtfully.

 _He doesn't know who you are, you're practically invisible,_

Usopp extended a hand as the band struck up a slow song. "May I have this dance?"

Sanji glanced down, glanced back up—and smiled.

"Well, why not?"

He accepted Usopp's hand and pulled him in, beginning to spin slowly across the floor. People parted like the Red Sea, and soon a decent space was cleared in the floor for the main attraction.

"Haven't you ever danced before?" Sanji whispered.

"But of course," Usopp murmured. "I have danced with royal families in the finest kingdoms all around the world. I'm renowned for it."

"Oh, is that so?" Sanji murmured, smiling.

"Perhaps I'm out of touch."

"Perhaps you are. No better time to regain it, Gene Kelly."

Usopp was aware all eyes were on them. As they spun and twirled, he spotted Franky, eyeing them suspiciously, and Chopper, staring with wonder-filled eyes; there were Koala and Sabo, murmuring something to each other; there was Brook, still playing along with the band; there was Ace, woken up at last and joining Luffy at the buffet table; there was Zoro, watching the two dancers with faint disinterest; and there was Sanji, _Sanji_ , right in front of him, practically glowing in the light of the chandelier.

What was one to do, in the face of such perfection?

"What's your name, anyway?" Sanji murmured.

Usopp pretended not to hear.

"Hey, masked man? What're you called?"

"My name is . . . a secret," Usopp murmured, relieved Sanji would not know he was dancing with such a lowly man, but at the same time bitterly regretful he could not reveal himself.

"Whatever for?" Sanji frowned. "And where are your ears?"

 _BONG_

Usopp froze, halting the dance abruptly.

 _BONG_

"Oh, dear, it's midnight already," Sanji murmured.

"I have to go!"

"What?"

 _BONG_

Usopp was already turning around and running, pushing past people with hasty apologies.

 _BONG_

"Wait!" Sanji exclaimed, hurrying after him.

Usopp threw a glance back before turning again and running, determined to keep his promise, determined Sanji would not find him out.

 _BONG_

He flew out the door and down the steps—

 _BONG_

 _BONG_

As he ran down the street, turning into a narrow alley, he felt the weight of his clothes begin to vanish.

 _BONG_

He continued to run, stumbling as his ordinary clothes began to return.

 _BONG_

 _BONG_

 _BONG_

At last, he slowed to a halt, shivering in the cold night's air.

 _BONG_

His normal clothes had returned, the fine ones and mask gone without a trace, and upon feeling the sides of his head, he found that his ears were back, too. He checked his pockets and was relieved to find they still held the food he had snatched.

He stared in the direction of the castle longingly—but there was no going back there now. He had a promise to keep, and so did Nami.

* * *

When Usopp quietly pushed open the door, he kicked off his shoes and crept into the parlor, where he found Nami fast asleep on the couch. She must have fallen asleep, he thought, waiting for him; it _was_ getting late, after all. Of course, he wasn't quite right about this, but he would learn this later.

He spotted something on the ground: That white rod Nami had used earlier . . . her magic wand. Usopp bent down and picked it up gingerly, as if it might explode, and carried it to the table, where he set it down gently.

"Nami," he whispered, reaching out and shaking her shoulder. "Nami, I'm back. Hey, wake up!"

Nami made a face and slowly opened her eyes. When she spotted Usopp, she jumped up and pressed herself against the back of the couch.

"Oh, it's just you," she said in relief, sliding back down. She brought her legs up, curling up against the armrest. "Tell me, how did it go?"

"It was _amazing_ ," Usopp exclaimed. He removed the food from his pockets and set it on the table. "That's for you, if you want—"

Nami gratefully took some. "Did you get a dance with the King?"

Usopp grinned. "I did! But . . . midnight came, and I had to leave. Got away just in time."

"Hm . . . that's too bad." Nami took another piece (she had finished off the first so quickly).

"And you were right, no one recognized me," Usopp continued. "Not even Franky or Chopper, or Koala—I didn't tell anyone who I was, I'm a man of my word!"

"I know you are."

Usopp cleared his throat. "Um, so, the dance was really great! But you have some explaining to do!"

Nami tensed as she finished off her second helping.

"I mean—I had no idea," Usopp continued. "Magic's _real?_ And you can use it?!"

Nami gave him an odd look at this.

"That is . . . a relief, in some ways," she murmured. "I suppose you don't know about witches?"

"Nothing more than what's in stories."

"What you've heard is probably bunk, so I'll explain." Nami shifted on the couch, settling down. "Witch trials . . . they're awful things to live with."

"Witch trials?" Usopp said blankly. "But—the last witch trials were over a hundred years ago."

Nami smiled bitterly.

"How _old_ are you?!"

"You don't ask a lady her age," Nami snapped. She folded her arms. "Listen. Witches—witches are born, not made—and they can be born to mortal parents. Not only this, but . . . they can only die by a very old age or by . . . a fire."

Usopp frowned. "You don't _look_ old—"

Nami glared at him.

"Sorry, continue," he said meekly.

"If a witch faces something other than age or a fire which would kill a mortal . . ." Nami hesitated. "Their body vanishes, and reappears at some point in the future with the witch's wand. It could be the next day, or it could be a hundred years . . . what I'm saying is, at the time of those witch trials, I was in my second life."

"My head hurts."

"You can leave if—"

"I'm listening, I'm listening, I'll just process it later!"

Nami rolled her eyes. "As I was saying, my first life ended with a bad case of food poisoning. When I woke up, over fifty years had passed, and the witch trials had begun."

She shifted, clenching her hands. "I lived longer that time. I made good friends, other witches. We had to hide our magic from everyone else, but we practiced it in secret. Many innocents were burned, and few real witches. And—I don't know if it was chance, or someone found us out—one day, we all were discovered."

She gulped. "They burned Ms. Monday and her husband at the stake, and then they caught Ivankov and Perona and Duval . . . it was awful. Soon, Vivi and I were the only ones alive."

Usopp's eyes were wide, and he bit his tongue to save his questions.

"They caught us one day. Vivi was taken, and I—" Nami stared at the ground. "I won't pretend I was a hero. I just ran away. I didn't try to save her, they were chasing me—what could I do?"

She took a shaky breath. "I suppose dying was justice for that. I was chased right off the edge of a cliff, and I can only think she was burned at the stake."

Nami lifted up her shirt collar briefly to cover her face. When she lowered it, she'd composed herself somewhat.

"I woke up a few months ago behind this house," she said. She smiled faintly. "And that's when I met you."

Usopp blinked. "Wow. Oh my god. That explains so much. No wonder you were so freaked out when I talked to you."

"Good thing I did. I got a place to live, and you got an upgrade from a cardboard box to a house."

Usopp smiled. "Yeah. Uh, can I ask questions now?"

"By all means, go ahead," Nami said, stretching out and laying herself down on the couch with a yawn.

"How do you know modern stuff if you're from old times?"

"This house came with a lot of books," Nami said. "I read a lot while you were out, and I put stuff together from what you told me."

"Makes sense. Um, did you ever use magic recently before tonight?"

"I use it when I clean the house," Nami admitted. "It's faster than by hand."

Usopp's eyes widened. "No wonder you're so good!"

Nami smiled. "I'm good at many things. My turn to say something."

"Uh, okay. What is it?"

She hugged her shirt to her. "The reason I don't like going outside is . . . I don't like crowds, because of _all that_ , and if someone found out I was a witch . . ."

"How could someone find out?" Usopp interrupted.

"They could figure it out if they saw my wand, or found me doing magic," Nami explained. "But other than that, the only ones who can sense a witch in the vicinity, or magic about, is another witch."

"Then what's the big deal?"

"Let me finish!" she snapped. "I know I can trust you, which is why I told you all this. Based on your reaction . . . witches aren't common knowledge, right?"

Usopp shrugged. "I'm pretty sure most people think magic is a crock," he said. "I dunno how they'd react if they met a witch, but if you didn't hurt anyone, I don't think they'd try to hurt you."

"That's a relief," Nami murmured, yawning. "So . . . about King Sanji . . ."

Usopp grinned. "He's great, isn't he?"

"Not that! I meant why I helped you in the first place!"

"Oh, yeah. You said it could benefit both of us?"

"Correct." Nami sighed. "Obviously, it would benefit you if you could marry him—" Usopp choked— "because you've got it bad, you're so obvious about it. And as for me . . . the thing is, the witch trials may have stopped, but I don't know if the law banning witches was ever removed."

Usopp clapped a fist into his open palm. "Oh!"

"Exactly. If you can, find out if the law's still in place, and if it is, see if you can't talk King Sanji into removing it."

"Okay. I get it." Usopp straightened himself where he sat. "But how am I supposed to do that?"

"Well, you'll have to keep meeting him, won't you?" Nami said matter-of-factly. "It gets you closer to marriage in the first place. He might keep visiting the bar—"

Usopp's eyes widened. "Huh?! No way!"

"Pardon?"

"I mean—even if he starts coming back again—he can't know it was _me_ at the ball," Usopp mumbled. "There's no way he'd like me like _this_. He's the _King_."

"Then . . . you're saying you'd rather meet him in disguise?"

Usopp nodded. Nami turned so she lay on her back and stared at the ceiling.

"Okay," she said at last. "But only because this is good for both of us. I'll keep disguising you, and make sure to get out before the clothes vanish."

Usopp grinned, stood, hurried around the table, and seized Nami's hand in his own. "Thank you, thank you so much—!"

"Is tomorrow evening after your work okay?" she interrupted. "We can work out the details in the morning."

"Yeah, of course!"

"Alright. Now let go, I want to go sleep."


	4. Collusion

Usopp woke up to the smell of eggs cooking. He rolled out of bed and shuffled into the kitchen, where he found Nami preparing breakfast.

"Morning," she said without turning around. Usopp stared in wonder: The eggs were turning themselves over in the pan, and as he watched, the pepper sprinkled itself in, and the pan lifted itself from the stovetop, separating the eggs onto two waiting plates.

Nami caught the pan before it fell, set it in the sink, and turned around with a smile, holding her wand. "Breakfast is on."

Usopp blinked. "Uh . . . yeah. Okay."

He sat himself while Nami brought the food to the table.

"That was . . . really amazing," he said in awe.

Nami grinned. "Do you think so? It's not anything too special."

"But it is!" Usopp took a bite, waving an arm as he spoke. "It's so cool, seeing things working by themselves like that, and you make it look so easy!"

"Innate talent," Nami said, though she held her head high with a proud blush. "I'm more relieved you reacted the way you did, really."

"Even if I was a jerk about it, you probably could've done something terrible to me with magic," Usopp pointed out, shuddering at the thought.

"I would've had to remember the spell for wiping memories," Nami said. "I always forget what it is. And by the way, you need to go to the market today."

"Right, right," Usopp said. He made a face. "You need mushrooms again?"

Nami hesitated. "Maybe I don't. I'm thinking about giving up."

"Giving up?"

"Those mushrooms . . . I had needed them for a potion I was experimenting with," she said absently. "Something for permanently getting rid of scars. I haven't had much luck so far."

"Scars?"

Nami lifted her shirt, showing him her stomach and chest. They was marred with horrible whitish scarring, a sight which made Usopp gasp.

"When did you get _those?"_ he exclaimed.

"When I died by falling," she said matter-of-factly, dropping her shirt again. "Anyway, don't bother with the mushrooms."

Usopp sat back. "Okay."

They ate in silence, and once they'd finished, they went to the parlor.

"How'd you like to approach tonight?" Nami asked, pursing her lips thoughtfully.

Usopp coughed. "It's gonna be a bit awkward. I ran away in the middle of the dance last night."

Nami pinched the bridge of her nose. "Okay, let's think this through . . ."

* * *

"Usopp!"

"Hey, bro!"

Usopp grinned as he sat at a table in the workshop, resting his head in his arms. "Hey!" He had brought the groceries back home not long ago and had time left before he had to go to work.

"Sorry you had to miss the ball," Chopper exclaimed. "It was really fun!"

"Was it?"

"There was a really suspicious guy," Franky said with a scowl. "Had a Pinocchio nose, and he acted like he knew us."

"He was a secret agent," Chopper explained.

Usopp glanced away, shifting where he sat. "Oh."

Franky tilted his head. "You okay, bro?"

"Yeah."

"Alright." Franky grinned. "Other than that, it was great! Hope you had a good night, yeah?"

"Mm-hm. Nami and I just played cards," Usopp lied, "and I went to bed early. Pretty boring night."

"Can you tell a story while you're here?" Chopper asked hopefully.

Usopp grinned. "But of course! Any requests?"

"Make up something with the secret agent man!" Chopper exclaimed.

Usopp coughed. "Oh! Uh, okay!" He cleared his throat. "Once upon a time, in a quaint little town, there was a poor man. Despite his lack of wealth, he was content with his life; he had good friends, a roof over his head, and food to eat. But one day, a surprise came: the man happened to meet with the King himself!"

"This sounds . . . familiar," Franky remarked. "Go on."

"The poor man fell in love with the King," Usopp continued with a smile. "It was love at first sight! No, perhaps not first—perhaps second, or third—but one way or another, the peasant had a hopeless crush."

"What'd he do?" Chopper exclaimed, eyes shining. Franky gestured to him and he hurried over to pass Franky some heavy machinery.

"As it happened, a royal ball was to be held," Usopp continued, clenching his fist, "but the peasant was convinced he could not attend, as poor as he was. And he was ready to accept this . . . until he met with someone wonderful!"

Usopp grinned. "It was a woman who knew of his situation, and she wished to help him. She told him she was his, uh, fairy godmother, and she could get him to the ball! Before the man knew what was happening, she had waved a magic wand and granted him fine clothes and a fine mask to wear!"

Franky smiled. "Uh-huh. What next?"

"Naturally, the man hurried to the ball at once! It took quite some time, but the King himself joined in the dance, and the man, brave as ever (for he was very brave, I assure you), asked the King to dance!"

Usopp paused to clear his throat. "The brave man was happy to dance with his love at last, and he hoped the King felt the same way . . . but alas! When the clock began to strike the midnight chimes, he felt the magic begin to fade! At risk of being discovered, he fled the scene . . . vowing to return to see the King, if he was able."

Usopp took a deep breath and found Chopper and Franky staring at him.

"What?"

"We didn't mention the part where the secret agent danced with King Sanji," Chopper said, frowning. "Or when he ran out the door at midnight. How'd you know?"

Usopp jumped up. "Shoot, I'm running late, I have to get to the tavern! Part two of the story will be revealed tomorrow!"

He ran out of the shop.

* * *

Customers milled around the tavern and greeted Usopp amiably as he entered, heading for the back room.

"Hey, Usopp," Koala said, smiling. "There you are."

"I'm a little late, I know, sorry," Usopp exclaimed, disappearing and returning with his things. "Got held up talking to Chopper and Franky—"

"Well, we'll chat later, I've got customers to attend to," she said with a grin. Usopp hurried to his corner to set his things up while Koala returned to her work.

* * *

As usual, the customers thinned out as the sun sank in the sky, and by the time sunset came, the tavern was empty save for Koala, Usopp, Zoro, and Brook.

"Too bad you missed the ball, Usopp," Koala said, throwing him a cheeky grin.

"Ah, yeah," Usopp said, rubbing the back of his neck. "Uh, hope you had a good time?"

"The food was good," Zoro said with a nod. He glanced at Brook. "By the way, I've been meaning to ask, how'd you get a gig with the musicians there?"

"It was as simple as sending a letter to King Sanji," Brook said with a chuckle. "I played a song for him, he liked my music, and the rest is history."

"Speaking of King Sanji . . . someone got a dance with him," Koala said with a sneaky smile at Usopp.

Usopp sat up straighter, failing to hide a smile. "Oh? What was he like?"

Zoro frowned. "How'd you know it was a he?"

Usopp gulped. "Uh, I talked to Franky and Chopper earlier, they mentioned someone, so I just guessed."

"Hm." Zoro spun his mug on the counter, watching it wobble. "Then they already told you what he was like, right?"

"Chopper called him a secret agent, but that's about it."

"Well . . ." Koala looked up in thought. "I talked to him before the dance. He was a bit weird, but pretty nice. He knew my name for some reason, too . . ."

"I didn't get a good look at him, but he seemed familiar for some reason," Brook remarked. Zoro gave a nod of assent.

"Anyway, he ran out the door at midnight," Koala finished. She glanced at Usopp again. "Wow, I thought for sure you'd be more upset. What're you smiling about?"

"Nothing!" Usopp exclaimed, ducking behind the canvas. He peeked around again. "Upset?"

"Oh, never mind," Koala said, rolling her eyes.

They looked up as the door opened and two people entered.

"Evening," Sanji said with a smile, accompanied by Luffy. "I hope you all enjoyed the ball?"

Usopp ducked behind his canvas as the others assured him it was lovely and thanked him for the event.

"Usopp—red wine, please—I didn't see you there," Sanji added, glancing to where Usopp had hidden himself. He paid for his drink and went over to sit next to him, pulling himself up a chair while Luffy sat at the bar to chat with Zoro and Brook.

"Um . . ." Usopp swallowed nervously. "I-I'm . . . sorry, Your Majesty, I couldn't make it."

"Oh, too bad," Sanji said in disappointment. "I was looking everywhere for you . . ."

"I—what? Why?" Usopp exclaimed. "Uh, I'm, I don't mean to be rude, Sire—"

Sanji sighed. "Never mind." He watched Usopp out of the corners of his eyes as he went on, "I _did_ get a dance with a nice young man."

Usopp straightened up, barely hiding a grin. "Oh? Th—That's great!"

"I never got a look under his mask, but I'm sure he was _very_ handsome," Sanji continued. "He had a _lovely_ voice, too."

"Thank y—that is, I'm—very happy for you, Sire," Usopp said in a high-pitched voice, smiling.

Sanji's own smile faded and he stood, finishing off his wine. "We should go," he said abruptly. "Luffy, come on."

"But we just _got_ here," Luffy complained.

"I said we're leaving." Sanji placed his glass on the counter and offered a tip and a smile for Koala. "Thank you as always."

Koala nodded. Once Sanji and Luffy left, she turned to Usopp and threw a washcloth at him.

"Hey!" he exclaimed indignantly. "What was that for?!"

"You're such an idiot!" she exclaimed, now throwing a wet rag. It slapped against his face and he peeled it off, blinking in confusion.

"What did I do?" he demanded.

"Can I throw things, too?" Zoro asked.

"Hey!"

Koala huffed and crossed her arms. "Your work day's about over," she informed Usopp. "Start cleaning up."

"Um . . . okay," Usopp said, gathering his things and carrying them to the back room, cautiously eyeing her for fear she would start hurling things again.

* * *

"Did anything interesting happen at work?" Nami asked as they ate dinner together.

Usopp relayed what had happened with Sanji. Nami promptly threw a piece of bread at his face.

"Not you, too!" he exclaimed indignantly. "I don't know what I did!"

"You are an idiot!"

"You can't just say that without explaining why!"

Nami folded her arms with a glare. "You would not believe me even if I told you! Now hurry up and eat if you want to meet him."

* * *

"You are _sure_ you don't want him to know yet?" Nami asked, leaning against the wall by the front door.

"Of course I don't!" Usopp exclaimed. "I said it before, there's no way he'd like me like _this_ —" He gestured to his cheap overalls, spotted with paint. "I need to work up to it, okay?"

Nami stared at him and sighed very loudly.

"What?!"

"You are stupid." She raised her wand. "Get out of here as soon as the clothes appear—I can give you until ten. The more time you have, the better."

Usopp held still, eyeing the wand apprehensively despite that he knew Nami would not harm him.

Nami repeated the chant from the previous evening, and as before, Usopp's clothes were replaced with finer things, a mask covered his face, and his ears were nowhere to be found.

"Seriously, what's with the missing ears?" he said, feeling the sides of his head. "It's so _weird_ —"

" _Go_ ," Nami reminded him, suddenly clutching his shoulder as if using it for support.

"Right, okay! Thank you, I'll be back later!"

Usopp turned away and hurried out the front door. As soon as it shut, Nami shuffled against the walls, her vision growing dark as she fell across the couch into unconsciousness.

* * *

Usopp hurried down the street, glancing around. Few people were out that late, and no one paid him any mind.

It was not long before he reached the castle. With a deep breath, he ascended the stairs, confident that he would not be recognized for who he was.

"Halt," ordered the guard (Sabo) at the door. Usopp froze. "What business have you here?"

Usopp cleared his throat. "I request . . . an audience with King Sanji," he said, his tone growing bold. "I must speak with him about recent events."

Sabo eyed him. "Oh, you're from last night," he said at last. "I'll fetch him, but you're to leave immediately if he refuses."

Usopp gave him a nod, and Sabo entered the castle. He twiddled his thumbs as he waited, scratched his nose, glanced around—

"It's you."

Sanji stood at the entrance, staring at Usopp curiously. Sabo stood nearby, fidgeting.

"Your Majesty," Usopp said, dipping his head. "I wanted to apologize for fleeing last night. The ball was lovely, and you are a wonderful dancer . . . but I had an important matter to attend to. That is all."

"I see." Sanji cocked his head. "Well, thank you."

Usopp hesitated where he stood. "I . . ."

Sanji gave him an almost sad smile. "Would you like to come inside? I've made cake."

"Y—Yes, thank you, Sire," Usopp exclaimed in surprise.

"You, too," Sanji added to Sabo.

"What about guarding the doors?" Sabo said indignantly, though he seemed happy at the prospect of cake.

"Forget it, I'm sure these old things can do without an escort for now," Sanji said carelessly, patting the wood. "That cake won't eat itself."

Sabo sighed and followed him, Usopp trailing behind.

The room seemed so empty without the crowd from the ball and the buffet table. It was sparkling clean as if scrubbed by magic. Sanji led Sabo and Usopp to a door behind the thrones, after which they went down a hallway and turned left into a lovely room with a long dining table.

At the head of the table was an interesting sight: A fluffy coconut cream cake sat covered on the table, and Luffy and Ace were reaching for it with pained looks, the only things stopping them being the woman Usopp had seen next to Sanji the previous night and—to his surprise—the girl he had seen at the ball with the blue hair. Her mask was gone, revealing lovely large eyes, and her dress was not quite as formal; the choker still rested around her neck.

"Welcome back," the woman said pleasantly without looking up or releasing Luffy from the headlock. "And who is our guest?"

"Robin, lemme go," Luffy whined. He paused. "Guest?"

He and Ace looked up, momentarily distracted from their mission, to see Usopp standing behind Sanji and Sabo.

"Oh, you're the guy from last night," Ace said at last. He yawned and glanced behind him. "Hey, let go . . ."

The girl shook her head, refusing to release him from the bear hug. "King Sanji said to _not_ touch it right now," she reminded him.

"I did," Sanji agreed. He motioned for Sabo and Usopp to follow as he approached the four. With a scowl, he looked at Ace and Luffy and said, "You guys can't even wait a damn minute?"

"Nope," Luffy said. He wriggled under Robin's grip. "Lemme go!"

"Shall I?" Robin asked Sanji.

Sanji tapped his chin. "Oh, I don't know . . ."

"Hey!"

"Sure. You, too," he added to the girl with a smile. Ace and Luffy were released, and both dove for the cake but were promptly stopped by Sanji flinging a leg up to block them.

"I'm going to cut it, just _wait_ ," he hissed. They sat down impatiently as the other two seated themselves. Sabo started reaching for the cake when Sanji turned his back, but Robin gave him a very stern look and he meekly retreated.

"Where are the . . . Robin?" Sanji said distractedly.

Robin placed plates, forks, and a cake slicer upon the table.

"You're wonderful," Sanji said gratefully. He glanced at Usopp. "Well, what are you standing around for? Sit, sit . . ."

Usopp quickly seated himself next to Luffy, who was busy staring at the cake.

"Sire, you said you made this?" Usopp said, now drawing attention.

"Oh, yes, I love to cook," Sanji said as he sliced up the cake, serving it upon the plates. "I made quite a bit of the food from last night."

"It was all delicious," Usopp said in wonder as he received his slice. "You're a fantastic cook, Sire."

Sanji smiled proudly. "Oh, sorry, let me introduce you all," he said suddenly. "These are Luffy, Ace, and Sabo, my guards; Robin, my lovely advisor; and this young lady is—"

"More," Luffy demanded, holding up his empty plate with Ace.

"How did you—oh, never mind," Sanji said in exasperation. He gave them each another slice, and then Sabo one when he held up his plate hopefully as well.

"And . . . I never got your name," Sanji added to Usopp. The others stared at him expectantly, Robin and the girl eyeing him curiously. Robin murmured something to the girl, who gave a nod in response.

"My name," Usopp said. "My name is—"

"Why don't you have ears?" Luffy interrupted, staring at the side of his head.

Usopp self-consciously clapped his hands over where his ears should have been. "It's nothing, don't worry!"

The girl clasped her hands together, staring at Usopp pensively.

"Your name?" Sanji repeated, settling down at last.

 _Not Usopp, don't say Usopp, think of something cool, what did Franky say the other day, something about Japanese—_

"So-ge-King-Sanji," Usopp said, a little too quickly.

Sanji frowned. "Pardon?"

"Excuse me—Sogeking, Sire," Usopp repeated, going with his mistake.

"Interesting name," Robin murmured, eyeing Usopp speculatively. "Not your given one, I would imagine . . ."

"It is a nickname," Usopp agreed. "For I am known as the finest marksman throughout the land."

He tried the cake and found it delicious. Indeed, he was quite the sniper, though he had only ever practiced with a slingshot and a tree.

"Are you now?" Sanji said with a smile. "Yet I've never heard of you."

"Sadly, 'Finest marksman' is not a well-spread title," Usopp said mournfully, shaking his head in despair.

"Right, yes," Sanji said in amusement.

"How was your day, Sire?" Sabo asked, glancing at Usopp curiously.

Sanji sighed. "Not too good."

"He got rejected," Luffy announced.

" _Thank_ you," Sanji snapped.

"Rejected?" Usopp repeated.

Sanji shook his head. "I'm very interested in someone, but . . . I don't think he reciprocates."

"You're in love with someone?!"

The table turned to stare at Usopp at his outburst, and he shifted nervously.

"My apologies," he whispered.

Sanji raised an eyebrow. "No worries. I do like someone, yes, but if he doesn't return the sentiment . . ." He shook his head. "I should try to move on."

Robin leaned over and patted his shoulder comfortingly, while the girl next to her smiled sadly.

"Mr. . . . Sogeking," she said, turning to Usopp, "if I may . . . why do you not remove your mask?"

Luffy reached for the mask, intending to take it, but Usopp leaned away. "I should not remove it," he said by way of explanation. "For you see . . . I am under a terrible curse!"

Sanji snorted. "Hate to disappoint, Mr. Sogeking, but curses aren't real unless you mean the swearing kind. Your story's fanciful enough as it is, isn't it?"

"I—"

Robin cleared her throat. "With all due respect, Sire . . . curses and magic and the like are indeed real."

The others looked at her in surprise, and the girl sitting next to her shifted in her seat.

"What do you mean?" Sanji said at last.

"This may sound odd, but I can sometimes sense magic in the air," Robin continued. Her eyes flickered to Usopp and she gave him a subtle wink. "It's happened before."

"Oh . . . huh." Sanji turned back to Usopp. "In that case, Mr. Sogeking . . . what kind of curse would cause you to keep your mask on?"

Usopp bowed his head. "It has given me a hideous appearance," he said dramatically. "Men have fainted at the sight of my visage, and I am forced to wear this mask lest I spread fear and horror."

Sanji cocked an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

"I wanna see," Luffy insisted, reaching for the mask again. Robin gave him a stern look and he backed off.

"Why were you cursed?" Sabo asked, eyeing the mask curiously.

Usopp heaved a sigh. "'Twas my own fault, I'm afraid! One fine day I was practicing archery, and a stray arrow made its way into a sorcerer's yard. He threatened to take my bow and arrow, and I grew bold and stated that he could take my possessions, but never my good looks! As luck would have it, he cursed me on the spot, and I've been hideous ever since. In fact, it was this very same curse which took away my ears, though thankfully not my hearing."

"You're quite the storyteller," Sanji remarked with a smile.

Unseen, Usopp's eyes widened. "Th—Thank you, Sire," he said, struggling to keep his voice a normal pitch.

Ace nestled his head into his arms, falling asleep in seconds.

"Sabo, should we take him to bed?" Luffy asked, poking Ace's arm.

"Yeah," Sabo agreed, standing. He looked to Sanji. "Thank you for dessert, it was delicious as always."

"Yeah, his cooking's the best," Luffy agreed. He and Sabo got on either side of Ace and hoisted him up, half-carrying, half-dragging him out of the room.

"Mr. Sogeking, I see you've finished as well," Sanji said, looking to Usopp's empty plate.

"Oh, yes—I've never had a better cake," Usopp said, and this, at least, was not a lie.

Sanji smiled. "That's good to hear," he said happily.

"I'll clear these away," Robin offered, standing. She glanced at the girl. "Would you like to help wash dishes, or would you rather retire?"

"I'll help," the girl said, standing. "It's no trouble at all."

"Really, I can do it," Sanji said gently.

The girl shook her head. "You know I don't mind, Sire . . ."

Robin gathered the plates up, holding three in each hand, and looked at the last one. "Oh, dear," she said. "I just _can't_ carry anymore. I'm awfully sorry to ask, Mr. Sogeking, but would you mind getting yours?"

"He is a guest," Sanji said half-heartedly.

"I don't mind," Usopp said quickly, taking his plate and standing. "I could meet you back here in just a minute, Sire?"

"If you like," Sanji said with a little shrug.

Usopp followed Robin and the girl out the door, down a small hall, and into the kitchen. It was magnificent—high ceilings, vents, and fine stoves and ovens made for an ideal birthplace of gourmet food.

"Who are you working with?"

They had reached the sink, and Robin had only set the dishes on the counter. When Usopp registered she was talking to him, he hesitated. "Come again?"

Robin turned to him with a serious look, and the girl made as if to reach into her sleeve, holding her hand at the ready. "You should know that even if you could take down the guards, you would have to get past not only us—" Here she glanced to the girl— "but King Sanji himself is a skilled fighter. I wouldn't try anything if I were you."

"You—You think I'm—" Usopp took a step back, wary of the threats. "I'm not here for any malicious reason, I assure you!"

"Your story was quite fanciful," the girl remarked, though she lowered her hand, as if deciding against whatever threat she'd been planning.

"Perhaps . . . parts were exaggerated," Usopp admitted, shifting on his feet. "But I promise, I don't want to hurt anyone."

"Who are you working with?" Robin repeated.

Usopp gulped. "I . . . I'm sorry. I dunno how you knew, but . . . I promised I wouldn't tell. They mean no harm, either."

Robin and the girl glanced at each other.

"Very well," Robin said at last. "If not to assassinate, why _are_ you here—?"

A sudden noise made the three look around. Luffy had crept into the kitchen, and he looked around shiftily. When he spotted the three, he froze and tiptoed backwards, straight into Sanji.

" _Hi_ , Sire!" Luffy yelled. He tried to run, but Sanji seized the back of his shirt and held him.

"I won't have you stealing food," he snapped. "How many times do we have to talk about this? I left some dinner rolls in your room, so go have that."

Luffy grinned. "Really? Thanks!"

Sanji released him and he was gone in the blink of an eye.

"Sorry about that," he said to Usopp with a smile, turning to him and coming forward. "I hope we weren't interrupting?"

"Not at all," Robin said with an easy smile. "Just having a little chat. We can take care of the dishes if you'd like to excuse yourselves."

"I could do it, really," Sanji offered. "Ladies shouldn't—"

"Sire, we do them most nights," the girl pointed out.

Sanji shrugged. "If you insist. Thank you very much." He offered a smile to Usopp, who followed him out of the kitchen, glancing a nervous look back at the ladies.

"Sorry to ask, but what's the time?" Usopp asked suddenly.

"About nine," Sanji replied.

"Ah, I see," Usopp said in relief. "I have a very important engagement at ten o'clock, you see . . ."

"Do you now?" Sanji said, a smile in his voice. "What's this engagement?"

Usopp cleared his throat. "The Queen of the Underground World has asked to speak with me," he said, sitting on a sofa at Sanji's silent invitation.

"Underground World, hm?"

"Oh, yes! For a long time, its inhabitants have searched for a map—which, if found, would bring them inordinate amounts of money! 'Tis a small population it has, the Underground World, and its inhabitants have been so unfortunate to have been struck with poverty."

"Poor devils," Sanji murmured.

"But the Queen has asked to meet with me now," Usopp continued in a hushed tone, "for the Guardian Wolf believes he has captured someone wearing a red hood . . . someone who knows the location of the map!"

"Ah, and of course they want you to help interrogate this person?"

"I would assume so. Speaking of interrogation, I was once on a mission of espionage . . ."

* * *

Usopp's stories, intertwining and weaving amongst themselves, went on throughout the hour. When he realized how long it had been, he jumped to his feet.

"My apologies, Sire!" he exclaimed, taking Sanji's hand on impulse. "I must make haste or I will be late! May I return tomorrow eve?"

Sanji glanced at his hand and lifted it with Usopp's, standing. "I don't see why not," he admitted with a shrug. "We are at peace, and frankly I don't have many duties to attend to."

"Many thanks!" Usopp exclaimed. He hesitated before bolting down the hall, sprinting for the front entrance.

A few minutes passed, and Robin came to find Sanji sitting on the sofa again.

"Sire?" she said. "I didn't want to interrupt earlier . . ."

Sanji looked up and smiled. "Oh, you're fine! Where's . . . ?"

"She's gone to bed." Robin sat next to him. "That man . . . Sogeking . . . what do you think of him?"

Sanji rested his chin in a hand, staring at the wall. "He's nice," he said at last.

"You've allowed him to come back tomorrow."

Sanji shrugged. "I like his stories, and . . . he reminds me of someone I know. But for the life of me, I just can't think of who." He smiled. "Maybe seeing him more will spark something. There's no harm, in any case, he seems genial."

"Perhaps you're right." Robin stood again. "Will you be retiring now?"

"Oh, I think I should look at some recipes, and then I'll go," Sanji said idly. He stood and stretched. "Robin . . ."

Robin waited.

"I know I should move on, but . . . I still wish that Usopp . . . had felt the same way."

Robin patted his shoulder. "Can't have everything in life, you know. You could send your guards after him if you wanted and make him stay here until he reciprocates."

"I could never do that!" Sanji exclaimed.

"Only teasing."

* * *

Usopp stayed in the alley (void of streetlamps) until he had transformed back. He straightened his overalls, checked his ears, and strolled down the street casually.

When he reached his house, he knocked softly and entered to find Nami sitting on the couch, eating a piece of bread.

"Hello," she exclaimed, looking up as if embarrassed. "Sorry, I was hungry. How did it go?"

"It was great," Usopp exclaimed, sitting next to her with a grin. "Did you know he cooks?"

"The King?"

"Yeah, he's great!" Usopp stretched and yawned. "And no one knew me at all!"

"Who else was there?" Nami said curiously.

"Well, the guards Ace, Sabo, and Luffy," Usopp said. "And a woman named Robin, Sanji's advisor, and . . ." He paused. "A girl? I never got her name."

"And what happened?"

Usopp relayed the events, and hesitated before telling her what had happened in the kitchens.

Nami narrowed her eyes. "They knew you weren't acting alone," she murmured. "But how?"

Usopp spread his arms in a shrug. "Beats me. I think they'll leave me alone now, I promised I wasn't there to hurt anyone."

Nami nodded slowly. "Okay. That's good. And King Sanji likes someone else, you said?"

Usopp sighed. "Yeah, I don't know who, but he must be really great to catch _his_ attention. I'll just have to try really hard, since apparently he rejected Sanji. Jerk." He hugged himself and grinned. "But, y'know—it's so much easier to talk to him when I'm in disguise! It's like I'm way more confident and cool!"

Nami eyed him. "Didn't I tell you earlier?" she said. "That is part of the spell. It gives you a confidence boost."

"Oh, that explains it," Usopp exclaimed. "Yeah, no way I could not be nervous in any other situation. You're the best!"

"I know." She yawned. "I will be off to bed."

"Me, too. G'night."

"Goodnight."


	5. Do it for Her

Usopp turned around at the noise behind him to see Nami shuffling into the kitchen, squinting.

"Oh, morning," he exclaimed, nearly dropping the bowls he held. "Seaweed salad good for breakfast?"

"Okay," Nami murmured, going to the table. She sat and rested her head in her arms while Usopp brought breakfast to the table. She sat up properly after a few bites of salad and idly stared out the window at the rain.

"Same plan tonight, right?" Usopp asked between bites.

"Hm? Yes."

"Great!" Usopp grinned. "I hope things go well, Sanji's the best, he's so handsome and sweet and—"

"Okay."

Usopp paused. Nami wasn't even looking at him.

"Something wrong?" he asked, smile dropping.

Nami blinked and turned away from the window. "No, it's nothing," she said quickly.

Usopp frowned at her.

She sighed. "I was thinking about Vivi."

Not knowing what to say, Usopp nodded slowly and waited for her to go on.

"Rainy days were the safest when we were being hunted," she explained, returning to her salad. "Because they could not start the fires. We would find somewhere to huddle under, or cast spells to keep warm and dry . . . took up a good bit of energy, especially since we had to magic ourselves unseeable as well, but it was worth it." Her smile was distant. "We'd stay huddled together for hours at a time before one of us had to sneak out and get food, and then we'd move and start again . . . we had to stay close together at night, too, it was just too dangerous to be apart . . ."

She smiled into nothing before looking at Usopp again, who'd been watching her while she spoke.

"What is it now?" she exclaimed.

"You really miss her . . ."

"Of course I do," Nami snapped, eyes suddenly bright. "It may have been over a hundred years in actuality, but it's been only three months for _me_ since—since she was ki—"

She stood, knocking her chair backwards, the half-eaten salad forgotten. "I'm going back to bed," she announced. "See you tonight."

Usopp only stared, dumbstruck, as she hurried away. Too late, he called, "I'm sorry!" as a door shut down the hall.

He slowly finished his food, set the chair standing, and left the house.

* * *

"Sup, bro!" Franky exclaimed as Usopp came in. "No umbrella, huh?"

"No, we don't have one," Usopp said, wringing out his hair and shivering. "I wish Nami was here . . ."

"Your housemate?" Chopper said curiously. "Why?"

Usopp froze. "Uh, no reason."

"How's she doing?" Franky asked.

"She was a little upset earlier," Usopp admitted. "She started talking about an old friend who died, and . . ."

"Aw," Chopper exclaimed sympathetically.

"Too bad," Franky remarked, sitting on a stool and grabbing an oil can. While he greased and checked his joints, he said, "You gonna continue your story from yesterday, or do you have a new one?"

"I'll continue it," Usopp said. Chopper sat near expectantly, clutching his hat.

"Let's see," Usopp said, tapping his chin in false thought. "Where did I leave off last time . . . ?"

Chopper waved a hand around. "The secret agent ran away and his magic clothes disappeared!"

"Ah, yes!" Usopp exclaimed. "The following day, the peasant went about his usual duties, all while thinking about the King and the dance. Likewise, the King thought of that mysterious masked man the whole day—who was he? Where had he come from?"

"The most important things for a king to be thinking about," Franky agreed. He tried to stand, but promptly crashed to the ground, having forgotten to oil his legs. Chopper hurried over to him and helped him up with a glower, grabbing the can to do it himself.

"That evening, a pleasant surprise awaited the peasant," Usopp continued. "The kind woman who had helped him, his fairy godmother, was waiting for him in his home! She knew the peasant wished to see the King again in the name of true love, and she promised to continue to disguise him. She cast her magic spell upon him and promised him until midnight once more. The peasant thanked her and hurried out, eager to meet with the King once more!"

Franky stood and patted Chopper on the back, thanking him for his help. Chopper grinned and clapped Franky in the small of his back while professing he didn't care one bit about him; Franky nearly fell over again from the force of the slap.

"How'd the lady get into his home?" Chopper added to Usopp, processing what he'd said.

"Magic," Usopp whispered.

Chopper grinned and sat on a stool, listening eagerly.

"Disguised once more, the peasant hurried to the castle on foot and arrived at the doors," Usopp said, sweeping a hand upwards to demonstrate the height of the entrance. "He regaled the guard with a tale of hope and heartache, and the guard was moved to tears and happily let him past."

"One shoddy guard," Franky remarked. Usopp shot him a look and Franky grinned. "Sorry, go on."

"Once inside, the King was happy to dine with the peasant, and he asked the man for his name," Usopp said. "The peasant was a quick thinker, and gave an alias worthy of a nobleman. The King was impressed by this name—"

"What name was it?" Chopper interrupted.

"I dare not speak it," Usopp said in a hushed tone. "The name is perfect for such a man as the peasant, and of course for the King, but never for someone like myself. However, for this story, we shall call him . . . Sogeking."

Franky grinned while Chopper rested his head in his hands.

"Sogeking sat with the King and spun grand tales of his travels—the King was enraptured, but it seemed he had something on his mind. And it was so, for he himself admitted he was troubled by something . . . alas, before Sogeking could question him further, the clock began to chime midnight, and he was forced to flee . . . but not before bestowing a kiss upon the King's royal hand."

Usopp grinned to himself at the very thought of doing such a thing.

"So?" Franky said. "What was bothering the King?"

"To be continued!" Usopp exclaimed. He grinned at their disappointed faces. "Hey, I'll keep going tomorrow, okay? I should head to work now."

"Okay, have fun!" Chopper said.

Usopp saluted, stood, and hurried out, ducking his head to take cover from the rain.

* * *

The day in the tavern passed by as usual, though Koala seemed to be ignoring Usopp; he occasionally tried for a wave or a smile, but she would turn away, serving a customer instead.

"What did I do?" he said weakly. The day had flown by and now he, Zoro, and Koala were the only ones left.

"You were stupid," she said abruptly. "And I'm not in a great mood."

Usopp clamped his mouth shut for fear of being suplexed. Zoro rolled his eyes at him; it seemed he was on Koala's side.

* * *

Dinner passed silently for Usopp and Nami. He eyed her as they ate, and when the plates went in the sink, she finally spoke.

"I'm sorry about earlier," she said. "I am fine now."

"It's fine—uh, you're fine—that's good."

"How'd your day go?"

"Koala's still mad at me for something," Usopp said. "I dunno what. Hopefully she'll be better tomorrow."

Nami frowned. "She and that guard, the one named Sabo, they like each other, don't they?"

"Yeah, why?"

"That explains it."

"How?!"

"Get into the living room, I will grab my wand."

Usopp threw up his hands in exasperation as Nami left. He trudged to the living room and waited, hands on his head as if ready to go through a full-body scan.

"Oh, put those down," Nami muttered when she came back, clutching her wand. She took a deep breath.

"Remember, go as soon as I finish," she reminded him. "I can give you until ten again. Watch the clock."

"Right."

Nami raised her wand and started the chant. Usopp waited and checked himself over once the shimmering of the air had faded.

"Go," Nami said firmly, holding the wall tensely. Usopp hesitated, eyeing her curiously, before he turned and hurried out the door. As before, Nami staggered into the parlor, and she fell on the couch, curling up on her side.

* * *

"Hm?"

Usopp halted at the door, and Ace, guarding it, looked him up and down.

"Oh, hi," he said, yawning. "Sogeking, right? Wait here, I'll get the King."

Usopp nodded and waited while Ace disappeared inside. He returned following Sanji.

"Well, good evening, Mr. Sogeking," Sanji said with a smile. "Would you like to come in?"

"Thank you, Sire," Usopp said graciously with a short bow. "May I say, you are looking quite dashing tonight."

Sanji snorted. "Thank you. I'll say the same for all of you except your face."

Usopp chuckled and followed them inside. He was led to a different room than before, a small parlor where sat Robin, Luffy, Sabo, and the girl with the blue hair.

"Good evening, Mr. Sogeking," Robin said without looking up from the cards she was dealing. "You're just in time; we were hoping for another player. Do you know this game?"

"I do," Usopp lied, eyeing the board. "And, er, greetings!"

"Hi," Luffy said, swinging his feet in the air. "This game's kinda slow, but nighttime's supposed to be slow, too, so that's okay."

Sanji invited Usopp to sit next to him while Ace seated himself with his brothers.

"Are we missing a few pieces?" Sabo remarked, looking over the board.

"Oh, dear me, I think we are," Robin said sadly.

"Forgive me, I must have misplaced them in the cabinet," the girl next to her exclaimed. "I could get them . . . ?"

"I'll go with you," Robin said, standing with her. "And . . . one more person, just in case . . ."

Usopp felt a sense of dread creep over him.

". . . Mr. Sogeking, if you don't mind?"

"He is a guest," Sanji murmured.

Usopp gulped. "I don't mind," he lied, standing. "We'll only be a moment, yes?"

Robin smiled ominously. "Sorry to bother you with this," she said with hardly any sincerity. "If you could follow us . . . this won't take long, Sire."

"I want more food," Luffy could be heard saying as they departed the room.

"You _just_ had cookies," Sabo reminded him.

Their voices faded.

Usopp looked around as they walked to a large cabinet. He shifted on his feet as Robin opened the doors.

"So you can't reveal who you're working with," Robin said without turning around. "But _why_ are you here?"

Usopp swallowed nervously. "Um . . . well . . ."

The girl gave him a look and made a threatening motion to her sleeve, and finally Usopp caved.

"Two reasons," he blurted out. "One personal, one as a favor!"

"Stand down, soldier," Robin said in amusement. She came back up with the missing pieces and closed her eyes briefly. "They're arguing . . . we have another minute."

"The personal reason . . . ?" the girl prompted.

Usopp looked away. "San—that is, King Sanji—he's, well . . . I . . . it's a long story, but, er . . ."

He cleared his throat loudly and mumbled, "I-love-him."

He looked back at the two, sure that his face was burning with embarrassment under the mask. They glanced at each other.

"How sweet," the girl said with a smile. "Then you must wear the mask due to shyness?"

"Something like that," Usopp agreed, holding himself tightly.

"You should know he's in love with someone else," Robin said abruptly. "I hate to disappoint, but . . ."

"I—yes, it was mentioned last night," Usopp said. "But—! But with some time, I'm sure I could win him over . . . especially if that person has turned him down . . ."

"Perhaps," Robin said thoughtfully. "And your other reason?"

"I need to see the laws of this land," Usopp said. "You know—a list, or a book—such a thing exists, doesn't it? A compilation of what can and can't be done?"

"I know what a rulebook is," Robin said with a smile. "But didn't you say you weren't here for malicious intent?"

"Oh, I don't intend to steal or edit," Usopp said hastily. "I only need to see which laws are currently in place . . ."

"Is that so, now?" the girl murmured. She glanced to Robin. "Could we show him?"

"We could," Robin agreed. She glanced to Usopp. "With supervision. But for now, the others are becoming impatient; we should return."

"One more thing—" Usopp rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "I don't actually know the game we're playing."

"I'll explain on the way," Robin said kindly.

* * *

The game was called Clue, one which Usopp had never seen before, let alone played. Robin explained (to everyone, but mainly to recap for Luffy) that the idea was that someone had been killed, and the point was to find out who the killer was amongst seven possible culprits.

Each player had a piece; the girl took Ms. Peacock, Usopp took Ms. Scarlet, Robin took Prof. Plum, Sanji took Col. Mustard, Sabo took Ms. White, Ace took Mr. Green, and Luffy took Dr. Orchid.

"I forget, are we trying to find out who the killer was, or who was killed?" Luffy said distractedly.

"Killer," Ace said through a yawn. "Honestly, pay more attention . . ."

"We could change it up and guess who our victim was," Robin suggested. "Which means one of us is puppeteering a corpse . . ."

The girl and Usopp shuddered.

"That's interesting, let's do that," Sabo agreed.

"Why not?" Sanji said with a shrug. "Hardly changes the objective."

The game continued. Soon, the girl playing Ms. Peacock announced she wished to make an accusation.

"I think . . ." She brought a metal piece to her room. "The victim was _Ms. Scarlet_ , done in with the _candlestick_ , in the _ballroom_."

The others looked at their cards. Usopp showed Ms. Scarlet to her, and she nodded and marked it off.

When it was his turn, Usopp cleared his throat.

"With my renowned skills, I've worked out the solution," he said gravely. "But just to be sure, we'll check our cards . . . I believe the victim was _Ms. Peacock_ , killed by the _candlestick_ , in the _ballroom_."

Right away, Robin showed him Ms. Peacock, alive and well.

"Curses!" Usopp exclaimed, marking this on his paper. "I must be rusty . . ."

"I'm sure," Sanji said with a little grin. Usopp's smile went unseen underneath his mask.

* * *

The game finally ended with Sabo the victor, correctly stating the victim as Col. Mustard, the weapon as the rope, and the location as the study.

"I'll be off to bed," Ace announced sleepily as they put away the game.

"G'night, everyone," Luffy said with a wave. He and Sabo escorted Ace away, leaving behind the others. The girl wandered to a side table and picked up a little bell resting upon it, idly giving it a ring.

"The moon's rising fast," she remarked. "Do we have time for another game . . . ?"

"Witches and Wizards, maybe," Sanji mused aloud. "Well—Mr. Sogeking, if you don't mind, will you be staying long?"

"I only have until ten, Sire," Usopp said with an apologetic bow. "Meet a duke, dance with a duchess . . . there are other duties, again, I must attend to afterwards—" Here the girl interrupted with another distracted bell-ringing— "though I do wish I could extend my stay—if that is not impolite."

"No impoliteness in wishing, worry not," Sanji agreed with a smile. "Though it's almost nine now, you should know."

"Ah, then I have another hour, at least . . ." Usopp hesitated.

"Why don't you share more stories of your travels?" Sanji suggested. "They're very fanciful, I must say."

"And all true!" Usopp lied proudly. "I'd be glad to, Sire."

"Oh, call me Sanji," Sanji said carelessly. He turned away as Usopp choked on air and continued, "To the dining room, then? It's quite cozy in there."

Robin and the girl gave Usopp sly looks as he recovered and hurried after Sanji.

* * *

The time was spent by Usopp telling stories. Sanji seemed to keep an odd eye on him the whole time, and his expressions fit each part of the story perfectly.

When Usopp faltered during one part, Sanji cleared his throat. "I hate to interrupt, but . . ."

"Sire?"

"You . . . seem to remind me of someone, but I just can't place who," he said. Usopp froze. "I think it must be someone very important, so all the stranger that I can't think of a face or name . . ."

"Someone very important? Perhaps you've heard of me before this week," Usopp said bravely. Of course, Sanji knew him without the mask—but _he_ was the furthest from importance in every reality.

"Hm. Perhaps," Sanji said, obviously not buying it. He shook his head. "I just . . . haven't met that many people I would remember so well, aside from the ones in this castle—" Here he cast Robin and the girl fond looks— "and _those_ ones . . ."

Robin tilted her head. "The . . . _artist_ you received that mask from, Mr. Sogeking," she said carefully, "they must be very skilled, no?"

"No—that is, yes, of course," Usopp said, checking himself over. "And very brave, too, to withstand the horror that is my face . . ."

"I knew an _artist_ like that," the girl said rather sadly. "We were very close . . . but . . . she died, three months ago."

Everyone turned to her with surprised faces.

"I didn't know," Sanji said at last. "And not that long ago, either . . . how awful. I'm sorry, my dear."

The girl nodded. "She was very strong, but at that point . . . it was bound to happen sooner or later."

"Oh, an illness or the like," Sanji said in sympathetic assumption.

Robin held her shoulder gently, and then glanced to Usopp. "It's very close to ten," she remarked. "Should you . . . ?"

"Oh me, oh my, you're right! How the time flies," Usopp cried, leaping up. He took Sanji's hand in his own and held it up to his mask as if pecking the back. "Sire, thank you once more for your hospitality—may I return tomorrow eve?"

"I—yes," Sanji said, startled. Usopp backed up and turned around, hurrying to the door.

The girl straightened up, rubbing her arms. "That man is an enigma, isn't he?"

"I just wish I knew who he reminded me of," Sanji murmured, holding his own hand, the one that had been kissed not two minutes before. "Honestly, there aren't . . ."

He hesitated. "Maybe it's—no, it can't be. Never mind."

Robin smiled. "Your guards are fast asleep, by the way."

"You know everything," Sanji said with a smile. "What about Usopp? How is he?"

"I'm afraid I don't know _that_ , Sire."

"Ah," Sanji said in disappointment. "Well . . . are either of you hungry?"

* * *

"Nami, wake up . . ."

Nami slowly sat up on the couch and squinted. "Oh, it is you," she murmured.

Usopp, now free of fancy clothes and mask, sat at the other end of the couch with a grin. "I kissed him."

"You _what?"_

"Don't sound so shocked! It was just the back of his hand!"

"Oh, that is more likely." Nami sat up properly. "Did you bring back some food?"

"There wasn't any this time," Usopp said with a grimace. "Sorry—"

Nami scowled. "I couldn't get anything from the fridge, either, I was sleeping."

"You already had dinner, why does it matter?"

"Never you mind. What else happened?"

Usopp slowly related the events of his visit.

"So they know why you're there . . ." Nami murmured. "It is a good thing you didn't put your trust in the wrong people."

"I guess so," Usopp said with a helpless shrug. "Those two are really mysterious, they're obviously hiding something—"

"Like you _are not_ —?"

"—But they're willing to help me look at the laws, so we're gonna have to do this at least one more night," Usopp finished.

Nami hesitated before nodding with a small sigh.

"Something wrong?"

"No. I'm going to bed."

Nami stood and shuffled down the hall. Usopp followed after a moment, intending to get to bed himself . . . where he would dream of dancing with the King, free of mask and masquerade.


	6. Spaced Out Beats

"Are you getting up?"

"Not now."

"You sure? I'm gonna make breakfast . . ."

"I'm tired. I'll eat later."

". . . Okay. See you."

After breakfast, Usopp left the house, Nami still in bed. The air and streets were damp from yesterday's rain, and each footstep slapped wet and slick against the pavement.

He had kissed Sanji—merely the back of the hand, true, but he had _kissed_ him nonetheless. And Sanji had liked it—well, he hadn't disliked it—well, he hadn't shown open disgust towards it—but maybe, just maybe, Usopp thought, the glimmer of whatever chance he had with Sanji had just grown wider.

Usopp grinned and swung his arms back-and-forth and side-to-side as his step became jaunty and his almost maniacal smile would make passerby hurry their children away.

He was practically walking on air with his head in the clouds, and so he almost didn't notice when he floated right by the shop. He crashed back to Earth blinking in shock and quickly backed up.

"Zoning out, are we?" Franky said as he entered. He clapped him on the back, and Usopp winced at the smacking of metal to flesh.

"Maybe," Usopp admitted. He grinned at Chopper in greeting and said, "I was thinking about the masked man's adventures . . ."

"More of the secret agent?!" Chopper exclaimed, arms waving about excitedly.

"What adventures has the suspicious weirdo got up to now?" Franky asked.

"Why do you hate m—him?!" Usopp exclaimed indignantly. "He never even did anything to you!"

"Because when _we_ talked to him, he was suspicious as all get-out," Franky said in exasperation. "But I like your version of him. Go on."

"I'm sure you'd like him if you met him again," Usopp muttered. "Anyway! Where did I leave off again? Ah, yes—Sogeking wished to ask the King what was troubling him, but was forced to flee lest his identity as a peasant be discovered. And he definitely kissed the King's hand! That happened."

He grinned. "Moving on . . . with the help of his fairy godmother, who once again had waited for his arrival, Sogeking was able to return to the castle the following night. The guard at the door recognized him and graciously allowed him inside once more. Sogeking was quickly becoming a welcome visitor at the castle, it seemed! But this time, something had gone horribly wrong . . . a _murder_ had taken place within the castle walls, and now Sogeking himself was a suspect!"

Franky reached for a bottle of cola as Chopper gasped. "Boy," he muttered, "that escalated quickly."

"Why was Sogeking a suspect?!" Chopper said indignantly. "He wasn't even there, was he?!"

"Loathe as he was to suspect such a fine man, the King had to take everyone into consideration," Usopp explained. "And since Sogeking had visited the night before, he could very well have set a trap . . ."

"Oh, no!" Chopper exclaimed. "What happened next?"

"Despite his status as a suspect, Sogeking volunteered his services to deduce the killer's identity." Usopp clenched a fist. "The other suspects included the King's advisor, two mysterious young women, and the King's three guards . . . and unfortunately, the King himself!"

Before he could go on, Franky butt in with, "Who was murdered?"

"What?" Usopp said.

"You said someone was murdered. Who was the stiff?"

"Oh!" Usopp cleared his throat. "His name was unknown . . . but he had fine curly hair, dark as the night, and an unusually long nose . . . he was known as the royal painter before he died!"

Franky grinned at this. "Uh-huh."

"What was his name?" Chopper asked eagerly.

"His name . . ." Usopp paused. "Shall not be revealed! But for this story's sake, we will call him . . . Colonel Mustard! He was never in the army, it was only a nickname."

"I like it," Franky said. "Who's Sergeant Ketchup?"

"No one, don't be silly."

"That name sounds familiar," Chopper remarked, resting his head in his arms.

Usopp laughed. "Does it? Anyway, Sogeking set out to discover the culprit—but seeing as he was a suspect himself, he was accompanied by the King and the others. Their first clue was found with the body itself . . . rope marks on the wrists!"

"Not on the neck, huh?" Franky said curiously. Chopper shuddered.

"Goodness, no—though this was surprising to Sogeking as well!" Usopp tapped his nose, grinning as he wove the tale. "Perhaps Colonel Mustard had been in a fight—Sogeking suggested this to the others, but the King's advisor pointed out there were no signs of a struggle, nor did the rope appear to have cut off circulation in any vital areas."

"How'd he die, then?" Chopper asked with a touch of morbid curiosity.

"This is exactly what Sogeking and the others asked themselves," Usopp said, raising a finger by his head. "One of the young women in the party—we shall call her Madame Scarlet—suggested it was perhaps poison, as there were no physical signs of death. Sadly, the castle's doctor was away at this time, but for the time being everyone thought it safe to assume the cause of death was indeed poison."

"Injected or ingested?" Franky asked.

"No one could find an injection site, and so they assumed ingested if anything," Usopp explained. "At this point, the second young woman, we shall call her Madame Peacock, asked that the group begin examining the castle's rooms for clues, and so they set off to explore the place." He pointed as he spoke, seeing the imaginary rooms in his mind's eye. "The ballroom, the conservatory, the foyer . . . they found many an odd item lying about, such as a candlestick and a revolver, but the candlestick was clean and cold and the revolver in a similar state."

"You've gotta go to work soon," Chopper said, looking at the digital clock nearby.

"But when they reached the study, where the body had first been found, they—!" Usopp halted and looked at the clock. "Oh, geez—I'll just finish this up real quick—um, they found the rope in the study and a few things knocked over, so it seemed the victim had been tied up in that area! Perhaps the poison had been force-fed to him, suggested one of the guards, but at that moment, the victim walked into the study, alive and well!"

"Wait, what?!" Chopper yelled.

"That's one heck of a plot twist!" Franky exclaimed.

"Colonel Mustard explained everything," Usopp said quickly. "During dinner the previous night, when he had visited the King, he had meant to add Tabasco sauce to his food, but accidentally sprinkled on a poison instead, one which makes the drinker appear dead, but really they are only sleeping!"

"How do you mix up hot sauce and poison?!" Chopper exclaimed.

"He was careless! In any case, after dinner, he had gone to the study to set up a demonstration using rope, but managed to tie himself to the chair in the process—the poison kicked in just as he untied himself, which explained the rope marks on his body, and why he had apparently been found dead. The end, for now!"

"Some ending for a thirty-second invention," Franky remarked. "So it was mostly the victim's fault all along."

"More or less!" Usopp jumped up. "Gotta go, bye!"

* * *

When Usopp entered the tavern, Koala made a point of not looking at him save for the nod of greeting in the beginning. Zoro would sometimes look between her and Usopp (or what he could see when Usopp was ducked behind his easel), and when Brook joined the bar, he often looked as though he wished to say something, but stayed silent.

The time of evening came when the bar was empty save for Zoro, Brook, Koala, and Usopp, and Usopp finally worked up the courage to ask.

"Why are you mad?" He set down his paintbrush. "I mean, I'm sorry for whatever I did, but . . ."

Koala paused in wiping a mug and set it on the counter. Zoro watched with interest, slowly sipping his final drink of the evening, while Brook tapped out a faint rhythm with a finger, eyes darting between them.

"The way you spoke to the King last time he was here," she said slowly. "Because of that, he hasn't come back. So, not only did I lose a customer, but Sabo hasn't been coming here either."

"The way I—was I rude?!" Usopp exclaimed, thinking back to the last time Sanji had paid a visit to the tavern.

"Hardly, but I think that was the problem," Koala muttered. "Sorry, I shouldn't be mad at you. You didn't know what you were doing."

"Why do I feel like everyone knows what's going on but me?" Usopp mumbled, resting his chin in his hands.

"Shouldn't we tell him?" Brook murmured to Zoro.

"No, he'll get it sooner or later," Zoro said with a shrug. "This is more fun anyway. Better than TV."

"What are you guys whispering about?" Usopp said, looking over his easel.

"I wonder if he would even believe it if we told him," Koala remarked to Zoro.

"I'm still here!"

"That's the thing, he'd probably deny it," Zoro agreed. "There's no hope."

"Really, you two," Brook muttered reproachfully.

"I'm going home," Usopp announced, standing and gathering his art supplies. "Um, Koala, I still don't get it _because no one's explaining_ , but I'm sorry."

"Sorry for ignoring you," Koala said with an apologetic smile. "See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Usopp agreed with a tentative smile. Brook came over to help him with the supplies.

* * *

"I thought that might be it," Nami said once Usopp had finished telling her of his day.

"Why didn't you explain?!" Usopp exclaimed. "Is everyone determined to hide stuff from me?!"

"Because even when Koala told you what was bothering her, you didn't understand exactly what you did," Nami said. "I thought, too, that that would happen."

"I live in a web of lies and secrets," Usopp said dramatically, flopping onto the couch.

"Much of that is your fault!" Nami drew her wand. "I'm ready when you are. Do you feel like revealing yourself to the King tonight?"

"No, of course not! Not yet, anyway—" Usopp stood and stretched. "Maybe soon? I don't know—"

Nami rolled her eyes and they went to the front door. She raised her wand, and Usopp kept an eye not on the wand this time, but on her.

When she finished the spell, she leaned against the wall in an attempt to be casual with her usual order of, "Go."

Usopp stood still. "Nami, is something wrong?"

"I said go."

Usopp frowned, noticing her legs wobble. "Nami . . . why do you always want me to leave the second you finish the spell?"

"Leaves . . . more time for . . . you," she murmured, looking away. She began sliding down the wall.

"Nami—" Usopp knelt and caught her. "Hey, what's going on?!"

She shook her head weakly. "Nothing . . ." The wand slipped from her grasp and clattered to the floor. "I'm . . . fine . . ."

Her eyes fluttered shut and she became dead weight in his arms.

"Nami—hey, Nami!"

Gentle shaking brought forth no response, but her breath was steady. Usopp half-carried, half-dragged her to the parlor and laid her gently on the couch, afterwards bringing her wand out and placing it on the table.

"Be back later," he whispered.

* * *

"Oh, Sogeking," Sabo said, meeting him at the door. He yawned. "Wait for just a second . . ."

"No, young Sabo," Usopp said, holding up a hand as an idea popped into his head. He furrowed his brow briefly in thought under the mask. "You should know . . . there is a lady who greatly misses your company."

Sabo turned back to him, eyes wide. "Is that so?"

Usopp nodded.

"Really?" Sabo said, grinning. "Oh, geez, I've missed her too—I'll sneak down tomorrow to see her—thank you!"

He turned and hurried into the castle. Usopp silently congratulated himself.

"Mr. Sogeking?"

He looked at the girl in surprise. She gave him a smile. "Good evening. Come inside."

"Where is Sanji?" Usopp asked, following her indoors, where they met with Robin as Sabo resumed his post.

"I thought we should meet with you privately first," Robin said, leading the two of them down a hall where Usopp had never set foot. "You needed to see the laws of the land, didn't you?"

She opened a door and they entered the library. Usopp looked around and spotted what the girl was looking at: A thick volume on the highest shelf.

"How are we gonna get that?" he muttered.

Robin and the girl glanced at each other.

"Shall I?"

"If you want to."

As Usopp watched, he had to stifle a shriek when an arm sprouted from the high shelf and plucked the book from it. A chain of newly-sprouted limbs carried the book down to the trio, and Usopp caught it, eyes wide. The arms vanished and he stared at Robin in shock.

" _What_ was _that?!"_ he exclaimed.

"Do keep your voice down," the girl murmured.

"You seem surprised," Robin remarked. She beckoned, and they sat at a table. "I don't really blame you, however . . . I'm sure you knew since we could tell there was magic about your disguise, but I have certain abilities."

"A witch," Usopp said, comprehension dawning under the mask.

"She is," Robin said, gesturing to the girl, who pulled a wand similar to Nami's from her sleeve. "But I only have my abilities . . . because my mother was impregnated by a witch. I can copy my body parts across surfaces . . ." Here she sprouted a third eye blinking upon her forehead. "And I can tell when there's magic in the air . . . but nothing more than that."

Usopp stared at her.

"What?" Robin said in amusement, her third eye vanishing. "I hope we weren't wrong to trust you with this?"

"Not at all," Usopp said. "I might . . . tell my companion about it, but . . ."

"So long as you trust them in turn, I'm sure it will be fine," the girl said softly, stowing her wand away again.

Usopp blinked and looked down at the book again. "Oh, right, gotta start looking . . ."

As he rifled through the pages, a thought occurred to him and he looked up. "Does King Sanji know?"

"About us? No," Robin replied. "It's not that . . . we don't trust him, it's just . . . well. I'm sure you understand, your companion being what they are."

"I see." Usopp frowned at the pages. "Um, is there an index or something?"

With their help, he soon found the page he was looking for and skimmed the list of laws. At last, he found what he was looking for:

 _Any perſon found to be a witch, ſorcerer, or other magicker ſhall be put to death on the ſtake without a trial._

He gulped. "Okay. Found it." He shut the book. "I'll tell her tonight. Thank you so much."

Robin sprouted a chain of arms, and Usopp watched in wonder as they carried the book back up to the shelf.

"I wish you best of luck with King Sanji," the girl said with a cheeky smile.

Usopp looked at her, intending to thank her, but hesitated.

"Yes?"

"I don't think I ever learned your name," he said slowly.

"Oh dear, really?" she exclaimed. "My name's—"

"Sogeking?"

The three whipped around in their seats to see Sanji standing in the open door.

"I thought I heard voices," he explained with a smile of greeting. "Having a secret meeting?"

"Hardly," Robin said smoothly. "I wasn't sure where you'd gone off to, Sire, and I thought I'd show Mr. Sogeking this fine collection."

"Ah, I see," Sanji said. "Sogeking, I am glad you're here . . . I wanted to speak with you in private, if I could."

"P—Private?" Usopp repeated, standing. "Of course—Sire—Sanji."

He cast a nervous glance back at Robin and the girl as he followed Sanji out, and they gave him encouraging smiles.

* * *

"Here we are . . ."

They stood on a small balcony overlooking the side of the castle. While Usopp watched Sanji uncertainly, Sanji's gaze remained fixed on the night before them.

"It's a beautiful night."

"Yes."

Sanji shifted. "I figured out who you remind me of."

Usopp froze. "Who . . . ?"

"The one I love."

Silence.

"Then . . ."

"I suspected as much." Sanji looked at him now, eyes unreadable. "Somehow . . . you have feelings for me."

Usopp hesitated, and then placed one hand bravely upon Sanji's resting on the balcony.

"Yes," he admitted, voice growing strong. "Sire, I love you."

Sanji chuckled. "So, I was right . . . this time."

He didn't remove his hand, but neither did he make any other movement.

"Not long ago, I thought _he_ loved me, too. But I was wrong."

"Then—" Usopp's hand shook over Sanji's, and he brazenly took it up in both of his. "If I remind you of him—?"

"I'm sorry." Sanji took his other hand and clasped Usopp's with it gently. "I'm so sorry. You're wonderful, but I can't let go of him yet."

Usopp nodded slowly and pulled his hands away. "Even when . . . I'm like this, you still . . . I understand."

"Thank you. You've been amazing."

"I'll go."

Sanji looked up at him. "Oh? But it's not ten yet."

Usopp turned away. "I have—an early engagement tonight. It cannot wait any longer. Adieu."

He made his way to the door.

"Will you return another night?"

Usopp paused.

"I hope so."

He vanished behind the door. Sanji folded his arms on the balcony railing and slouched, head resting on his forearms.

"Sire . . ."

He looked up again to see Robin standing the doorway.

"Evening," he said dully. "I suppose you could hear us?"

"My apologies." She leaned against the wall. "I only eavesdropped to make sure you weren't in danger."

"I see." He turned around, back to the railing. "Was I too harsh?"

"Not at all. You were as gentle as could be, really."

"That's good. I hope he comes back sometime."

Robin tilted her head to look at the stars glimmering above. "It's a lovely night."

"Yes."

* * *

Usopp crept into the house, mask and fancy clothes still present, and found Nami fast asleep on the couch. He went to the kitchen and returned not long after with a bowl of warm alphabet soup, which he set on the table. He sat on the armrest of the couch and waited silently.

Nami stirred and slowly opened her eyes, alerted by the smell, and squinted at the bowl. She looked around and jumped when she spotted Usopp at the edge of the couch.

"You're back early," she murmured, sitting up and taking the bowl. "Thank you . . ."

Usopp got himself seated properly on a cushion (with Nami's legs out of the way now) and gave a nod. "So . . . how are you?"

Nami looked at the clock with a small frown as she warmed her hands with the bowl. "It's hardly half-past nine," she remarked.

"I left a bit earlier than that. I kinda dawdled in the street."

Nami looked at him again. He hadn't removed the mask.

"Those two helped me when I arrived," Usopp said. "Ms. Robin and that girl . . . oh, speaking of them—"

He briefed her on what he had learned about them, and Nami was staring in surprise when he finished.

"Two witches, underneath a royal roof," she said thoughtfully, sipping the soup. "Clever . . ."

"Robin said she's not really a witch, even though she has that weird power," Usopp corrected. "But . . . yeah. And . . . the law about putting witches to death—it was never abolished. I'm sorry."

Nami bit her lip and nodded. "Of course. We'll work on that later."

"Yeah."

Nami eyed him. "What else happened?"

"Oh, nothing."

"Take off the mask."

"What?"

"There's no need to keep it on. I know who you are. Just take it off."

Usopp stared at the ground. He lifted his hands as if weights had tied themselves to his wrists and brought them to the back of his head, untying the straps keeping the mask in place. He slid it off his face, along the length of his nose, and let his hands drop again.

"What's wrong?"

"It's pretty weird," Usopp mumbled, trying to scrub away the drying tear-tracks. "Geez, Nami, you missed everything. There was a sudden huge sandstorm outside, and I got caught in it, a whole bunch got in my eyes . . ."

"Liar."

He sat still as if struck dumb by the accusation.

"What's wrong?" Her voice was gentle this time.

Usopp shook his head. "He . . . Sanji, King Sanji, he . . . doesn't love me."

Nami waited.

"I thought . . . maybe he'd confess, but . . . but no, he said—he said that I'm great and amazing, he really did, but that whoever he has a crush on is still on his mind, and he can't let go of whoever it is—" Usopp smiled shakily. "I—I love him, but—if he'd be happier with his own crush, that's good. I want him to be happy, too."

"You were crying."

"It hurt!" Usopp set the mask on the table and propped his head in his hands. "It hurt. But just 'cause it hurt me doesn't mean I don't want the best for him—y'know?"

Nami slowly set the bowl on the table and hugged him around the shoulders.

"I would hit you," she muttered, "but . . . oh, god, Usopp. You poor idiot."

"What now?"

"Listen . . ." she pulled back and patted his shoulder. "Go back tomorrow in disguise and show King Sanji who you are."

"What?!"

"I have a _funny feeling_ it will turn out well. Trust me on this."

Usopp hesitated.

"What now?"

"I can't go tomorrow."

"And why is that?"

"You . . ." Usopp looked her up and down. "Is the magic . . . taking a toll on your body?"

Nami looked away. "Er . . ."

"Have you been collapsing _every night?"_

"I'm just out of practice," she protested weakly, taking up the bowl of soup again. "The energy to make that disguise from nothing has to come from somewhere, but it'll be better if I get used to it again—"

"No way." Usopp shook his head vigorously. "I'm willing to go back if you really think revealing myself is a good idea—and, I mean, I do owe Sanji at least that—but not tomorrow night. Maybe the night after, but you need a break."

The fancy clothes and mask shimmered as he spoke, and by the time Nami was hesitating, looking at her wand on the table and pressing her lips in frustration, Usopp was back in his regular clothes.

"Okay," she said at last, relenting. She leaned back against the couch. "Okay. You win. I'll take a break from this."

"Thank goodness," Usopp said with a relieved smile. "I mean, I don't want you to tax your body like that because of _me_ —"

"The eve after tomorrow night," Nami said. "If luck's on our side, I won't have to disguise you after that anyway. Okay?"

Usopp gave her a reluctant nod.

"Okay." Nami sipped more of the soup. "Thanks for the food . . . and I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"I'll get over it eventually," Usopp said confidently with an unmatching smile. He stood. "Gonna wash up and go to bed."

"Goodnight."

"G'night."


	7. Tower of Mistakes

"Don't look at me like that!"

Nami folded her arms.

"You don't have to, you know," Usopp clarified. "I just thought it'd be nice—"

"I've not been out for a long time," Nami muttered. "I did not plan on changing that unless that law is abolished."

"Exactly," Usopp said. "You haven't been out for a long time. Look, when that law does get removed, you'll have to—I mean, sooner or later, you'll have to go out eventually. So why not today?"

"There are _people_ outside!"

"No one wants to hurt you! I'd guess most people nowadays don't think witches are real—um, sorry—"

"Thanks for reminding me my existence is debated," Nami said dryly.

Usopp glanced away. "I'm gonna go meet Franky and Chopper in ten minutes," he said. "So . . . do what you want."

He stood after a moment and left to get ready. Nami looked out the kitchen window, where dew dripped down the pane.

When Usopp came to the front door, he found Nami waiting for him.

"I am ready," she said, voice shaking.

Usopp grinned. "Great!"

"My wand's in my stocking," she added as he hopped on one foot, wriggling his other into a boot.

"Why?"

"For protection."

"Who needs that when you have the strongest man in the world to protect you?"

She gave him a look.

"But the wand's a good back-up," he conceded.

He got his boots on and opened the door. Nami clung to his arm as they took a few slow steps outside, and Usopp shut the door behind them. They began walking down the road, Nami's eyes darting around.

"The future is so different," she whispered.

"Future—? Oh. I guess it must be."

She stared into shop windows with wonder as they walked by and almost stopped a few times to look at the displays. She asked Usopp about some of the things she saw, and he patiently explained, to her fascination.

"Knock-knock!" Usopp called when they reached the shop.

Franky and Chopper looked up and around.

"Hey, bro!" Franky exclaimed, lifting his welding mask and setting his tools aside. He spotted Nami and raised an eyebrow. "Oh, would this be your elusive housemate?"

"Yeah, this is Nami—Nami, Franky and Chopper, they run this place!"

"Pleasure," Nami said. She eyed Franky's prosthetics in puzzlement.

"Showing her around today," Usopp explained, bringing her to sit with him on a table.

"What do you like to do?" Chopper asked, staring at her with shining eyes as he trotted up.

She gave him a nervous smile. "Cleaning, counting . . . cartography."

"Wait, what?" Usopp said in surprise.

"I never told you that?" Nami said in equal surprise. "I used to draw up maps back then."

"Hey, that's rad," Franky said with a grin.

"Why do you have limbs of metal?" she asked him bluntly.

"Huh, you've never seen something like this?" Franky said. He came over to them and showed her his arms and legs.

"Oh, she's from a different place, they didn't have this kind of thing there," Usopp said hastily. Nami nodded.

"They're prosthetics," Franky explained. "I lost my original limbs in a train accident—"

"Train?"

Franky eyed her curiously.

"Um," Usopp said. "It's like, um, a really big and long metal thing, goes pretty fast and goes on for miles—I'll show you a picture later."

"Anyway," Franky said, shrugging this off, "I lost my hands and feet, and Chopper helped me make these new ones." He flexed his metal fingers with a proud grin. "Kid's pretty smart!"

"I am _not!"_ Chopper exclaimed indignantly, though he smiled. "You're so rude! Geez!"

Even Nami recognized his true meaning and smiled at his antics.

"That's so fascinating," she added to Franky, tracing the metalwork with her own fingers. "To think technology has come so far . . ."

"It's pretty great, and so am I," Franky said proudly.

"Oh! Usopp, are you gonna continue your story today?" Chopper said in excitement. "About King Sanji and Sogeking!"

Nami turned to Usopp with an incredulous look. "Pardon?"

"Not . . . today," Usopp said. "Maybe tomorrow?"

"Aw. Okay."

"But I could tell you a tale of a fox, a grape-bunch, and a crow!" Usopp said hastily. Refusing to meet Nami's stare, he cleared his throat. "Once upon a time . . ."

* * *

"Care to explain?" Nami said once they had left the shop. "What's this about a story about Sogeking and King Sanji?"

"It's . . . a stunning tale, based on true events," Usopp mumbled.

"Is it?"

"Leave me alone!"

They passed by someone and Nami unconsciously clutched his arm tighter.

"How're you doing?" he added.

"Better than I had thought," she murmured. "I always did feel safer with a companion."

"Good." They now stood outside the tavern. "There's gonna be a lot of people in here, there usually is this time of day."

He looked over and found Nami attempting to wear her blouse over her face.

"You can go home if you want!"

She sheepishly lowered her shirt again. "I'll be fine."

Despite this, Usopp felt the circulation being cut off in his arm as he pushed open the tavern door. He greeted the patrons with grins as he approached the counter.

"Hey," he said cheerfully. "Um, this is Nami—my housemate. Hope it's okay, but can she sit with me today?"

"Hi," Koala said with a kind smile to Nami, noticing her nervous grip on Usopp's arm. "Yes, of course. Nice to finally meet you."

Nami gave her a small smile and nod. Usopp waved to Zoro, who grinned in greeting and then eyed Nami curiously. She frowned at his hair before Usopp led her to the back room, where he picked up his supplies.

"It's crowded," she whispered as they sat together.

"Ah, yeah," Usopp murmured. "How are you?"

"What if someone . . ." She shook her head. "I am being silly."

"If anything happens, you have the strongest man in the world to protect you, remember?"

Nami cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Okay, but for real, Koala is probably the strongest woman in the world, so she can take care of anyone who starts getting in your face."

"Alright," Nami said in relief. She sat back and watched as he started to paint.

* * *

As customers came and went throughout the day, Nami stayed close to Usopp. Several times her hand twitched towards her wand, only for her to clench her fingers and withdraw. She was far more relaxed when the time came that the bar was empty save for Zoro, Koala, herself, and Usopp.

"So you're Usopp's wife, huh?" Zoro said at that time.

Nami glared at Usopp. "What have you been saying?!"

"Nothing! Zoro, come on, I told you we're not together!"

Zoro grinned, and Nami gave him a glare that actually made him flinch.

"Hey!"

Everyone looked to the doors to see Franky and Chopper entering.

"Been some time, huh?" Franky said, sitting at the bar with Chopper. "Juice and cola, please."

"Long time no see," Zoro said, lifting his mug in greeting.

"Hi, Zoro," Chopper exclaimed as Koala set his juice in front of him. Franky gave her the money and she passed him a bottle of cola.

"How's the shop?"

"Usual, you know how it is," Franky said. "God, people need to be more careful, we get broken wheels every week—hey, bro!" he added, spotting Usopp in the corner. "And sis!"

Nami frowned at her new moniker but said nothing.

"I love your paintings," Chopper said happily, looking around at the walls.

"Of course you do!" Usopp exclaimed. "I'm only the best painter in the world!"

"Sure, sure," Franky said, raising his bottle as if toasting.

When the doors opened again, everyone looked up to see a hooded figure enter. They sat at the bar and said, face shadowed, "I'm here to meet someone."

"Who would that be?" Koala asked, trying to peer under the hood.

"A young woman . . . oh, I can't remember her name . . ." A grin was heard in their voice now. "Kit . . . Katrina . . . what was it?"

"Could it perhaps . . . be something like Koala?" she suggested with a smile.

"Hm . . . yes, I think so . . ." The person threw back their hood, revealing blond hair half-combed over a large scar and a big smile. "Yes, that was it!"

Koala laughed in delight and leaned across the counter to hug him. "Sabo, it's been too long!"

"Sorry!" Sabo exclaimed, adjusting his coat. "I haven't really had the chance to come, since King Sanji stopped visiting—" Here he looked to the corner. "Speaking of which—hello, Usopp, it's been a while!"

Usopp peeked over the canvas and waved nervously.

"You'd be one of the royal guards?" Franky asked.

"Aye," Sabo said, putting some money on the counter for a drink. "Name's Sabo. You?"

"Franky, and this is Chopper."

"And this is Nami," Usopp said bravely. He gently pushed her so she peeked out from the side of the easel. "My housemate."

"Pleasure," Sabo said with a nod. He turned back to Koala. "I had to sneak out—I think it'll be fine, Ace is guarding the doors tonight and King Sanji said our guest wouldn't likely visit tonight."

"Guest?" Koala asked with interest.

"Oh, yes, he's visited every night since the ball—remember that man with the mask who danced with King Sanji and ran out?" Sabo said. "It's him. He calls himself Sogeking."

Franky and Chopper spat out their drinks. Usopp hid himself behind the canvas as the others gave them odd looks.

"He's a pretty nice guy, kinda weird, but King Sanji seems to like him," Sabo continued as Nami glared at Usopp (both hid behind the canvas now). "I wonder why he wouldn't visit tonight?"

"What's he look like under that mask?" Koala asked with great interest. Zoro leaned in to listen.

"That's the thing," Sabo said. "He never takes off his mask. He said something about a curse . . ."

"Uh, sorry to interrupt," Franky said, eyeing Usopp's corner, "and this might be a weird question—but by any chance, was there an alleged murder in the castle during the past few nights?"

"A murder?" Sabo said, startled. "The only thing I can think of is that board game we played, that one with the cards and the players like Ms. Scarlet and Col. Mustard. Why in the world do you ask?"

"No reason," Franky said quickly. He frowned over at the corner, but Usopp refused to come up.

"What have you been doing?" Nami hissed.

"I didn't think _this_ would happen," Usopp whispered. "Franky and Chopper don't visit here often—"

"Do you ever think before you do things?!"

"Usopp, why are you hiding over there?" Koala asked, craning her neck in an attempt to peer over the canvas.

"I'm not," Usopp lied, peeking over and avoiding looking at Franky and Chopper. "There's just a bit of . . . detail work . . . I'm doing . . ."

"Mm-hm." Koala turned back to Sabo and they continued chatting. Franky was silent this time, pensively drinking his soda as Zoro looked at him curiously. Nami rolled her eyes and sat back, watching Usopp paint.

Several minutes passed before the door opened again, and someone else entered.

"Hey," Ace said, scratching his head sleepily. "Sabo, King Sanji asked me to come get you. I tried telling him . . . it was a bad idea, but . . . he didn't listen."

"What?" Sabo said, looking around as Ace sat next to him.

"Hi, everyone," Ace said to the party. He glanced at Franky and Chopper and they introduced themselves, and Usopp quietly introduced Nami.

"Another guard," she whispered.

"Yeah," Usopp murmured.

"The escort mission'll have to wait," Ace said with a yawn, and he buried his head in his arms, falling asleep on the counter.

"Oh, that's what he meant," Sabo murmured. "He's got narcolepsy," he added for Franky's and Chopper's benefit. "Oh, well, guess we'll have to wait till he's awake to go back, huh?"

"Should I bring out a pillow?" Koala asked.

"If you want."

Perhaps only five minutes had passed when the door opened again and someone bounced in.

"Hey, guys," Luffy exclaimed. "King Sanji realized Ace was probably gonna fall asleep, so he sent me—" He spotted Usopp and Nami. "Hi, Usopp! And . . . ?"

"Nami," Nami said quietly. "I'm his housemate."

"Oh, okay! Long time no see, Usopp, Koala—hi, Zoro! Who're you guys?" he added, sitting next to Franky.

While Luffy, Franky, Chopper, and Zoro chatted, and Ace snored, Sabo turned back to Koala and they continued to talk.

"What kind of guards . . . ?" Nami whispered.

Usopp shrugged. "They're always like this."

* * *

Ace had just woken up when the door opened yet again.

"Do I have to do everything myself?" Sanji said in irritation, throwing back his hood and grabbing Sabo's and Luffy's ears. "What kind of King has to fetch his guards like this?"

"Sorry," Sabo and Luffy said together.

"Let go, that hurts," Luffy whined. "Why aren't you grabbing Ace, too?"

"I only have two hands, and it's not his fault he fell asleep!" Sanji sent an awkward smile Koala's way. "Hello, madame, sorry about this."

"Good to see you again, Sire," Koala said warmly.

"You're King Sanji!" Chopper exclaimed.

Sanji looked between him and Franky. "Oh, you two were at the ball, weren't you? Yes, I am, it's nice to see you." He sent a scowl Zoro's way. "And you."

"Whatever," Zoro said with a shrug.

"Aren't you going to say hello to Usopp?" Koala asked with a wink sent to the corner.

Sanji paused. Ace, Sabo, and Luffy stood, shifting and shooting looks over to the corner as well. Sabo and Luffy rubbed their hurt ears.

Finally, Usopp peeked over the canvas, and Sanji looked his way.

"Evening," he said with a rather sad smile. "It's been a while."

"Y—" Usopp gulped. "Yes, Sire."

Nami glared at him behind the canvas.

"And you are?" Sanji added, spotting her.

She slowly peeked around. "Hello," she murmured. "I live with Usopp. My name is Nami."

"A pleasure," Sanji said, though he seemed distracted. " _Housemate_ . . . I see. Well . . . farewell."

He and the three guards set off to the door, but while the guards went outside, Sanji paused. He looked at Usopp again with a small frown, scrutinizing his face and body.

"Sire?" Usopp said tentatively.

"Pardon me," Sanji said after a moment, and he left at last.

"How nice of all of them to visit again," Koala said with a meaningful look at Usopp.

"Um, yeah," Usopp mumbled.

Franky stood and stretched. "Thanks for the drinks," he said to Koala. "Chopper, you wanna get going?"

"Sure," Chopper said, hopping off his stool. "Bye! Thanks!"

They left the tavern.

"You're both stupid," Nami said.

"What?" Usopp said.

"You and the King," Nami clarified. She suddenly looked horrified and glanced around guiltily. "Oh no, don't tell King Sanji I said that—"

"Why not?" Koala said in surprise. "It's not like we would, but . . . ?"

Nami frowned. "Where I am from, it's forbidden to criticize the monarchy."

"What an awful place," Koala said sympathetically. "Don't worry, criticism is acceptable, and it's not like King Sanji's got thin skin."

Nami relaxed. "I see."

"You're right, anyway," Zoro said. "They're idiots."

"You're all my enemies," Usopp said dramatically. "I'm going home!"

"Alright," Koala said. "See you tomorrow!"

Usopp and Nami stood and put away the paint supplies, leaving the tavern afterwards. She kept a grip on his arm again as they walked back, her eyes flickering around the darkened streets.

* * *

"It can't be . . ."

"Sire?"

Sanji had stopped dead in his tracks, a haunted look upon his face. Robin and the girl had been silently observing him pace up and down the hallway for several minutes.

"But he doesn't . . . but _she_ . . ." Sanji twirled his hair between his fingers, staring into space.

"Robin," he said at last. "You've said you can detect when magic is in the air?"

"Yes."

"You weren't telling stories?"

"I wasn't."

"Did you ever . . . detect it about Sogeking?"

Robin and the girl glanced at each other.

"I did," she said at last. "Every time he was here. But why do you ask?"

Sanji ignored this. "Can you fetch those three?"

"Of course." She stood and left, leaving the girl behind.

"What's wrong?" the girl asked.

"I . . . I think I've figured out . . ." Sanji hesitated. "What's going on with our guest Sogeking. Could you go wait in the study, please?"

She hesitantly obeyed, standing and leaving just as Robin returned with Ace, Sabo, and Luffy, who fidgeted impatiently in front of Sanji.

"What's up, Sire?" Ace asked.

"Go into town," Sanji ordered, "find Usopp and Ms. Nami, his housemate, and bring them here."

"Huh?" Luffy exclaimed. "How come? Did they break the law?"

"Don't ask how come, just do it!" Sanji exclaimed, running his hand through his hair in agitation. "But don't use force! Get them to come quietly—don't hurt them. And watch out for Ms. Nami's abilities."

The guards looked between each other, hesitating.

"Very well," Sabo said at last. "Um, where do they live?"

"I don't know. Find out."

The three turned and left the room.

"Sire?" Robin said at last. "What does this have to with Mr. Sogeking?"

"We'll see when they get here," Sanji muttered. "I almost hope I'm wrong . . ."

Robin frowned in worry.

"Is there anything else I should do?" she asked at last.

Sanji took a deep breath. "Could you find some rope . . . and wait in the study with Vivi?"


	8. What Can I Do?

Nami let out a sigh of relief when they returned home. She pulled off her shoes and went to the parlor, falling onto the couch.

"That went better than I had thought," she said with a smile while Usopp kicked off his boots at the door and came in, sitting next to her. "Your friends are weird, but nice."

When Usopp said nothing, she glanced over and found a despondent look on his face.

"What?"

"I didn't . . . expect him to come back," Usopp murmured. "He hasn't seen me as myself for so long . . ."

"Well, you're going back tomorrow, aren't you?" Nami said, a bit bossily. "Trust me, you've got to tell him who you are."

"I know, I know!" Usopp fell back onto the cushions, staring at the wall. "I need to mentally prepare for that."

"I'll start making dinner."

"Thank you."

* * *

"How are we supposed to find out where they live?"

Ace, Sabo, and Luffy stood in the street, awkwardly looking around.

"I think the tavern's still open," Sabo said suddenly. "Maybe Koala knows."

"You just want another chance to see your girlfriend," Ace muttered, poking him.

Luffy grinned. "Sabo's got a _crush_."

"Don't act like it's a secret!" Sabo exclaimed. "Really, she might know, so it wouldn't hurt to check."

"Uh-huh," Ace said, grinning. "Lead the way."

They reached the tavern to find Koala locking the doors.

"Hey," Sabo said. She turned around and raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"Hey again," she said, smiling. "What is it?"

"Do you know where Usopp lives?" Ace asked, yawning.

"Sure, why?"

"King Sanji—"

Luffy's words were cut off by Ace slamming a hand over his mouth.

"Dunno if we're exactly allowed to say," he explained.

"I . . . see," Koala said with a frown. She gave them directions. "It's nothing bad?"

They looked around at each other.

"Dunno," Sabo admitted. "I hope not."

Koala stayed by the tavern and watched them leave before departing.

* * *

A knock sounded at the door.

"Who could that be?" Usopp muttered as Nami stiffened. He finished putting the dishes in the sink. "Just a sec . . ."

He went to the door and opened it.

"Ah, we got the right house this time," Ace said in relief.

"Told you it was this one," Luffy muttered.

"You did not!" Sabo exclaimed. He cleared his throat, turning back to Usopp. "Um, could you get your housemate? We need to see her as well."

"What's going on?" Usopp said in surprise, eyes darting between them. "What happened?"

"Can you get her here and then we'll explain?" Ace said impatiently.

Usopp shrugged and turned. "Hey, Nami! The guards are here! They want to see both of us!"

No response. Usopp sighed. "Come out!"

Nami slowly came around the corner, demeanor calm but hands shaking.

"Well?" she said, holding Usopp's arm again as if reassuring herself.

"This is kinda weird, but you guys are under arrest," Luffy announced.

Nami flinched and Usopp's eyes widened. "What?!" he exclaimed. "What'd I do? What'd _she_ do?!"

"We dunno, only King Sanji asked us to come get you both," Ace explained.

"I'm sure it's nothing bad," Sabo said reassuringly. He frowned. "He did say something about Ms. Nami's abilities . . . ?"

"But—!"

"I see," Nami interrupted with a smile. "I guess we'll come along. Excuse me for a moment, let me get my coat."

She suddenly slammed the door shut and locked it, leaning against it and snatching her wand from her sock.

"Hey!" Luffy exclaimed, banging on the door. "What's the deal?!"

"Shut up or I'll send you flying!" Nami yelled, clutching her wand to her chest.

"What the hell?!" Usopp exclaimed. "This is worse than before! This is so suspicious!"

"Usopp, do you think the King knows?" Nami hissed, now using the door for support.

"Huh?!"

"They mentioned _my abilities_. If the King's somehow figured it out—and _that law_ is still in place—"

She looked as if she might be sick. "We have to go. If it _is_ that, you might be arrested for being an accessory."

"How would he have figured it out, though?"

"I don't know! But I can't risk this!" She raised her wand and pointed it at him. "All this will have been for nothing, and Vivi will have died in vain!"

"What are you doing now?!"

"I have a plan to get us out. I'll faint, but not for long this time." She took a deep breath. "You've ten minutes as Sogeking; I have two of invisibility. Get us away from here."

Before Usopp could protest, she muttered the spell she had used so many times before, and he was transformed. Already she looked shaky, but now she pointed her wand at herself and said something else in a language Usopp did not know. Before his eyes, she vanished from sight, and he hurried forward to catch her before she fell.

"I got you," he whispered, shoving her wand up his sleeve and trying to be inconspicuous as he could about carrying someone unseeable.

He slowly unlocked the door, and the banging on the other side finally stopped as it swung open.

"Sogeking?" Luffy said in surprise. "Hi! Where'd Usopp and Nami go?"

Usopp cleared his throat. "Ah, greetings! Were you all looking for them? I'm afraid they've just left out the back door. I was visiting, you see, and they asked me to come talk to you in their place—dear me! Don't tell me they're in trouble?"

"Hope not," Sabo said. "But thanks. Any idea which way they went?"

"I lost them once they left the house. My apologies." Usopp shifted. "I should be heading back to my own home at this time, however."

"Okay," Ace said after a moment, eyeing him curiously. "Have a good night."

"I'll keep an _ear_ out," Usopp said cheekily. They grinned, waved, and went into the house, shutting the door behind them.

Usopp waited for a moment before bolting down the street. As he ran, he looked down and found Nami becoming visible in his arms once more, but she hadn't yet stirred.

"Where to go, where to go," he murmured.

* * *

"I'm gonna go to bed," Chopper said, yawning.

"I'm telling you, it's weird!" Franky exclaimed, throwing his arms in the air. "Bro Usopp's been telling us those stories about a guy named Sogeking, and now it turns out that that's actually what he calls himself?"

"We can ask Usopp tomorrow," Chopper pointed out. "I'm going to bed."

"There's something fishy here!"

A knock came from the door. Franky, caught up in pacing and muttering, didn't seem to hear it, so Chopper rolled his eyes and went to answer it.

He found himself looking up at a familiar masked figure, carrying a familiar woman in his arms.

"Sogeking!" he exclaimed. "You are Sogeking, right?"

"Yes, young Chopper," Usopp said quickly. "Begging your pardon, but may we take shelter here for a time?"

"Is she okay?" Before Usopp could answer, Chopper spun around, exhaustion gone. "Come in!"

Usopp came inside and followed Chopper to the living room, where Franky froze in his pacing upon seeing their guest.

"Sogeking's here," Chopper announced. "And . . . Nami, right?"

"What did you do to her?" Franky said with a scowl sent Usopp's way.

"Nothing! She'll wake up soon—" Usopp protested. He laid her gently on the couch, and she began to stir at last. "She's fine."

"Why do you need to stay here?" Chopper said curiously, watching her. "And . . . were all those stories Usopp told about you . . . were they true?!"

Usopp hesitated. "Parts were true," he said at last.

Nami sat up, looking around wildly, and eyed Franky and Chopper warily.

"We got away?" she said abruptly.

"I think so," Usopp said.

"Got away from who?" Franky demanded. He scowled into Usopp's masked face. "You're mighty suspicious, you know. Take off that mask."

"What?"

"I ain't having a guest here who suspiciously hides his face! Take it off!"

"I can't! I—"

Nami got Usopp's attention. "Where's my . . . ?"

Usopp passed her her wand, and she held it close.

"A stick?" Chopper said.

"A lucky stick," Nami murmured.

A knock came at the door, but no one heard it.

"Then why can't you take it off?" Franky demanded at last.

"It's a curse—"

"Bull!"

Chopper looked around, thinking he heard someone say something at the front door, but he stayed in the living room.

"Don't make him take it off," he said to Franky pleadingly. "He's a secret agent!"

"Oh, no . . ."

Franky and Chopper stared, and Nami's eyes widened, when Usopp's mask and clothing began to shimmer.

"Oh, god," Usopp exclaimed, turning around.

"It was magic after all?!" Chopper exclaimed in shock. Nami stood, clutching her wand, as Usopp's clothes transformed back into his regular ones.

"Hey, wait," Franky said slowly as the mask vanished and Usopp's ears returned. He took Usopp by the shoulder and spun him around, and his eyes widened.

"Usopp," Chopper said. "Usopp! You're a secret agent?!"

"Bro, it was _you?"_ Franky said blankly. "I—"

"Hey," Luffy said, striding into the living room with his brothers. "'Scuse the barging in, only we think we saw Sogeking coming in here and we need to ask him—"

Nami jumped, and Franky, Chopper, and Usopp looked around.

"Oh," Ace said. "There they are. Never mind about that first thing."

"I dunno how you guys got away, but just come quietly," Sabo said in exasperation. "There wasn't even a back door—"

"Wait, what did they do?!" Chopper exclaimed.

"I dunno, I swear I don't," Usopp exclaimed, backing away. "Guys, I'm sorry for lying, I'm so sorry—"

"Why do you want us?" Nami said, voice trembling as she raised her wand threateningly.

"Swear we don't know," Ace said, eyeing it apprehensively. "King Sanji said to get you, but not to hurt you."

"Not to . . . hurt us?"

"Yeah, there's no way he'd want to hurt either of you," Luffy said matter-of-factly. "He likes girls too much, and Usopp, you're you."

Nami slowly lowered her wand and approached Usopp.

"Those two," she whispered as Franky and Chopper looked between the guards and them, utterly confused. "The King's advisor and that girl. They're both magic-users?"

"Yeah," Usopp whispered.

"If worse comes to worst, they might help us escape, right?"

"I don't doubt it."

"Okay." Nami took a deep breath and turned back to the guards. "Okay," she said again. "We'll come."

Usopp stared at her in surprise.

"Let's go." She stowed her wand in her stocking and looked at Franky and Chopper, inclining her head in a polite bow. "Thank you. Pardon the intrusion."

Usopp gulped and went with her and the guards out of the house, leaving behind a very confused Franky and Chopper.

* * *

"Usopp was Sogeking all along," Chopper exclaimed, staring at where the five had left the house.

"I feel like such a jerk," Franky groaned, falling onto the couch dramatically. " _So_ not super."

"But what'd he and Nami do?" Chopper asked. "Why were they being arrested?"

"Can't've been anything bad," Franky said. "We know them, or at least Bro Usopp. He loves tall tales, but he's a good guy at heart."

Chopper frowned. "How come we didn't know it was him before?"

"Huh?"

"They . . . they've got the same nose," Chopper said slowly. "And the same hair. And the same body. The only difference was the clothes and the mask."

Franky sat up. "That _is_ weird. Usopp mentioned . . . a fairy godmother or something in his story, yeah?"

"Yeah?"

"That girl was pointing a weird stick at the guards," Franky said, scratching his head. "You don't think . . . that _would_ explain it, what with the clothes straight-up vanishing . . ."

" _She's_ the fairy godmother!" Chopper exclaimed. "Oh! Then maybe it was a magic disguise, and that's why we didn't know!"

"Okay," Franky said. "So . . . Usopp and his friend have been arrested, probably unfairly. And this part's a little more personal, but I feel like I gotta make it up to him, being a jerk and all."

"What do you mean?"

"We're gonna storm the castle," Franky said, leaning forward with a gleam in his eye. "But we'll need backup."


	9. Fight, Flight, or Love

Usopp and Nami followed Ace, Sabo, and Luffy through town, the palace looming ahead. Usopp looked over at Nami and found her shaking so much her teeth appeared to be clattering.

"It's okay," he whispered, grabbing her hand. She clenched it tightly. "It'll be fine. We can escape if things get horrible."

"I do . . . have another way out," Nami whispered.

"What?"

"But th-there's no telling when I will end up."

Her meaning sunk in and Usopp's eyes widened.

"Don't you dare," he whispered fiercely.

"What are you two whispering about?" Sabo asked, glancing back.

"Nothing," Usopp said. "We're just . . . worried. Y'know."

"King Sanji looked pretty stressed, but he's not gonna hurt you guys," Luffy said with a shrug. "He doesn't hurt girls, and again, Usopp's Usopp."

Usopp didn't bother asking, and Nami was silent.

They reached the steps at last, and the climb seemed so much longer than previous nights. Nami was shaking harder than ever by the time they reached the doors. Ace opened them up and led everyone inside, locking the doors with a bar across them before heading through a hall.

Outside a door waited Sanji himself, playing with his hair and staring at the wall. When he heard them, he looked up and immediately avoided looking at Usopp, instead focusing on a spot behind the group. Usopp, too, focused on Nami instead of him, squeezing her hand reassuringly.

"Good work," Sanji said at last. He turned his gaze to Nami, who stared at the floor. "Ms. Nami?"

Nami flinched.

"I need to speak with you alone. Will you come with me?"

Nami hesitated, unmoving. Sanji waited patiently, still avoiding looking at Usopp.

"Okay," she said at last. She and Usopp slowly let go of their hands.

"Thank you," Sanji said. "You three, please take Usopp in there—" He gestured to the door. "The other two are waiting."

"Alright," Sabo said with a worried glance at Nami.

"Please follow me," Sanji said, ever-polite, and set off down the hall with Nami following, her steps heavy.

The guards brought Usopp into the room—the study—where they found Robin and the girl waiting as promised.

"I heard everything," Robin said before they could say a word. "So you're Usopp. It's nice to see you in the flesh."

"Hi again," Usopp mumbled, eyes darting around. The guards sat at the table with the women, and at a gesture, Usopp sat with them.

"I'm supposed to restrain you if necessary," Robin said, holding up the rope Sanji had given her, "but . . . will you run?"

"Only if I'm threatened, or my companion is," Usopp said, voice growing stronger.

"That's fair." Robin stowed away the rope again. "Oh, we haven't met—my name is Robin. I'm the King's advisor."

"Yeah."

The girl smiled. "So _you're_ Mr. Usopp. I've heard much about you."

Usopp frowned. "Have you?" He looked around. "Does anyone know why Sanji . . . why this is happening?"

"He said it had something to do with Sogeking," Robin said. "But I can't think of why."

"Ah!" Sabo leaned forward. "Speaking of him—when we went to their house—" He glanced at Usopp. "Usopp and his housemate answered the door, but—"

"They shut it again, and when they opened it a minute later, only Sogeking was there," Ace finished with a yawn. "He left, and we looked around the house for that back door . . . he said they'd left through . . . but . . ."

"The house didn't even have another door!" Luffy exclaimed. "So we went to find Sogeking again, and we spotted him going into a house, but when we went in, we found Usopp and the girl again!"

"Odd," Robin murmured. "Speaking of _her_ , I got a look at her, and she seemed . . . familiar . . ."

She looked to the girl at the table but allowed her sentence to trail off without explanation.

"So what happened there?" Sabo asked Usopp.

Usopp gulped. "I . . . have a confession."

"You broke the law after all?" Ace said in surprise.

"No! I don't think so—it's just, with all this, and with Sanji probably knowing—" Usopp stared at the table. "I'm Sogeking."

A moment passed, and then a chorus of surprised "Oh's" was heard.

"Goodness," Robin said with a smile. "That explains quite a bit."

"Wait, how come Sogeking doesn't have ears but you do?" Luffy exclaimed. "And you've got the same nose! Why didn't me n' Ace n' Sabo realize?!" He looked at his brothers. "Are we all just dumb?!"

"I—no, it's just—"

"I'm keeping an ear out," Robin said. "King Sanji and your friend haven't started talking yet."

Usopp gulped. "She's a witch. The mask was magic. Even my best friends didn't know it was me. I dunno how Sanji figured it out finally . . ."

"Witches are a real thing?" Ace said. "Huh."

The girl hesitated. "I'm one," she admitted quietly. She drew out her wand. "I only began living here because . . ."

"If a witch dies by means other than fire, their body reappears at a different point in time," Robin completed. "And dear Vivi happened to appear in my room."

"Oh, so the thing about finding her outside was a lie," Luffy said in understanding. "But . . . Robin, are _you_ a witch, too?"

"Part-witch," Robin corrected, sprouting an arm from the table and making the guards jump.

"Is that how you always know what's going on?" Sabo said suspiciously.

Robin smiled as two eyes sprouted below her real ones and winked.

"Did you say Vivi?" Usopp said as the eyes vanished again.

"Yes, that's my name," Vivi said with a smile. "Oh, dear, you never did learn it . . ."

"That's . . . well, no, it can't be," Usopp muttered. "One hell of a coincidence, though . . ."

He looked to the door in agitation. "She's so scared," he said. "She was shaking all the way here. I told her about the law, that witches can still be put to death for what they are—she told me she died a really long time ago right after a witch friend of hers was caught, and—" He hugged himself. "It'll have been for nothing if she gets burned now, right?"

He looked around and was surprised to find Vivi's eyes welling up.

"I should have done the same," she exclaimed. "This whole time—I should have been trying to get King Sanji to remove that law, instead of doing nothing—"

She rubbed at her eyes. "I came here because of a similar situation," she burst out. "But—my friend was being chased, and I was about to be put on the stake—I didn't even wait for her. I just took the easy way out."

She tugged down her choker, revealing thin scars across her neck.

"It was so cowardly," she finished in a whisper.

"Jeez," Ace said awkwardly. "I never knew. I'm sorry."

"It was really over a hundred years ago," Vivi murmured. Usopp frowned at this, but let it go.

"So, why'd you come here in disguise, anyway?" Sabo asked, turning to Usopp as Vivi composed herself.

"Part of . . . the deal was learning about that law," Usopp said slowly. "To see if it still existed, and if it did, to convince Sanji to remove it."

"Makes sense," Ace said. "And the other part?"

When Usopp hesitated, Vivi spoke up for him. "He loves the King, it seems."

"Oh, we figured," Sabo said.

"What?" Usopp exclaimed.

"You're so obvious," Luffy said, picking his nose and flicking away a booger. "Every time we came to that tavern—but why the disguise?"

"Because he didn't love me like this," Usopp said, gesturing to himself. "So—I thought if I pretended to be someone else, someone cooler—"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Ace said. He yawned. "King Sanji's been in love with you for a pretty long time."

Usopp frowned. "Huh? No, he hasn't."

The expressions of the others turned to sympathy.

"Oh, Usopp," Sabo said gently, coming around the table and hugging him. "You poor idiot."

"Get off! What are you talking about?!" Usopp pushed Sabo off him. "He doesn't love me! How could he?! He told me himself last night, when I was Sogeking, that he likes me but not in that way because he still has a crush on someone else!"

"Who did you think that _someone_ was?" Vivi said curiously.

"It can't have been _me!_ I'm way cooler and confident as Sogeking, right?" Usopp said in exasperation. "If he didn't like _that_ , how could he like _this?"_

Robin gave him a pitying look, but said nothing.

"What're you doing, Robin?" Ace asked, dropping the subject.

"Eavesdropping," Robin said, distracted.

"How're things going?" Usopp asked quickly. "Is she gonna die? She's not, right?"

Robin frowned, and then pinched the bridge of her nose and cursed under her breath.

"Our ruler is a bigger idiot than we thought," she announced, standing. "I'm going to put a stop to this nonsense."

She strode out of the room, shutting the door quite firmly behind her.

* * *

Sanji and Nami entered the library, and Sanji shut the door behind them.

"Sit, please," he said. Nami seated herself and clasped her hands tightly in her lap, but Sanji remained standing for some time, pacing and looking at her occasionally.

Finally, he spoke up.

"You can use magic, can you not?"

Nami flinched.

"I'm sure you can."

". . . Yes," she whispered.

"Did you . . . make that disguise for Usopp?"

"Yes."

Sanji ran his hands through his hair, sitting in a chair across from her. "Why?"

She was silent.

"I mean . . ." He looked a bit sad now. "I know Usopp doesn't love me . . ."

She looked up at last with a frown.

"So why? Why would you conspire to have him come in disguise, and pretend he has feelings for me?"

Sanji appeared more agitated than ever, and Nami was only confused.

"Is that . . . why I am here?" she said slowly.

"Well, yes," Sanji said. "What other reason is there?"

Nami's hands shook before her. "I am not here . . . to be executed?"

"Executed?" Sanji said in alarm. "Why in the world would you—? I'm only asking for some kind of confession for this. I don't know if I'll assign some sort of penalty, but it certainly won't be _death_."

Nami narrowed her eyes. "Permission to curse you out, Sire?"

"What? Er, if you'd like—"

"You are a moron. Why do you think Usopp doesn't love you?"

"He loves _you_ , doesn't he?" Sanji said. "I realized that earlier . . . you stayed so close to him, and you two were holding hands—not to mention you live together. I really can't blame him . . . you're very lovely."

Nami groaned and leaned back in her chair.

"Did I say something wrong?"

"Yes, Sire."

Nami and Sanji looked over to see Robin entering.

"I had to eavesdrop," she explained. "Just in case. Usopp is still in the study, don't worry."

She approached Sanji, raised her hand, and smacked him upside the head.

"Do forgive my transgression, Sire," she said politely as Sanji rubbed the spot, blinking, and Nami stared at her in wonder. "But you're being almost as much of an idiot as Usopp. He told us everything," she added to Nami. "It's okay. They're fine with it."

Nami nodded slowly.

"What do you mean?" Sanji said blankly.

"If only you could have heard him," Robin said. "He loves you, Sire."

"What?"

"Usopp loves you," Robin repeated. "But he doesn't think you love him. We even told him, and he still thinks it can't be true."

Sanji's eyes widened while Nami muttered, "I knew it."

"He . . ." Sanji looked at Nami. "But you . . ."

"Trust me, we're not like that," Nami said. "He's not my type."

"He thought he wasn't good enough, so he disguised himself." Robin folded her arms. "And when _you_ rejected him like that, he thought it was all over."

Sanji's leaned against the back of his chair, staring at the wall.

"This whole time," he murmured. "This whole time, he's—and I've—" He jumped to his feet. "Shit, I have to tell him—is he still there?"

"Yes," Robin said with a smile. "But there's one other thing we need to address."

Sanji, ready to head for the door, hesitated and turned back. "What is it?"

Robin looked at Nami, prompting her, and Nami stood.

"Oh, of course—" Sanji bowed low to her, surprising her greatly. "My dear, I'm so sorry for all this, I've frightened you for nothing. Please forgive me."

"There is . . . something you can do in order to make it up to me," Nami said slowly.

"Name it," Sanji said, straightening up again.

"Remove the law which puts witches to death."

"What?"

"I am a witch," Nami said. "And . . ."

"I'm part-witch," Robin said, showing off several ears, eyes, and arms sprouting upon her body, making Sanji jump.

"Oh, shit," he said. "That explains a lot."

Robin smiled. "Our young charge is a witch, as well."

Sanji raised an eyebrow in surprise. As her extra parts vanished, Nami said, "Usopp told me there is a law which still exists. It states that anyone found to be a magic-user will be put to death without trial or court."

"Something like that is still around?" Sanji exclaimed.

Robin sprouted a chain of arms, and Sanji watched in fascination as they took the book of laws from its shelf and brought it down. She opened it up to the page Usopp had found the previous night and pointed it out to him.

"Wow," he said, first reading this and then flipping through more pages. "So many of these are unnecessary nowadays—this calls for a complete overhaul—" He looked up sheepishly. "I am so sorry, mesdames. I should have known about this, being the King."

"So that law will be removed from the book?" Nami said hopefully.

"Yes, of course," Sanji said with a warm smile, setting the book aside. "I won't stop you from practicing magic, if that's what you like."

"One more thing," Robin said, stopping him again. "How did you know it wasn't _Usopp_ who used magic? He was the main character, so to speak."

Sanji paused. "Well . . . can't only women be witches?"

Nami clenched her hands, and Robin closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Er . . . is that wrong?"

"Go see Usopp," Robin said in exasperation.

Sanji excused himself and hurried out. Nami leaned against Robin for support, her eyes filling with tears.

"Finally," she whispered, smiling broadly. "Vivi would be so happy."

Robin held her shoulders in thoughtful silence for a moment.

"I thought so," she said at last. "You were so scared at first, I wasn't sure . . . but you really do fit the description. 'Her name was Nami . . . she was brave and fierce and beautiful, quick to jab, but so soft and kind once you knew her well.'"

Nami frowned at her. "Usopp said all that about me?"

"Not Usopp," Robin said gently. "Come with me."

* * *

"He was trying to make you jealous," Luffy explained. "By telling you about the ball, I mean."

"He was _not_ ," Usopp insisted. "Stop making fun of me! He was just trying to tell me about his night! Besides, it was really me that time, so—"

Usopp, Ace, Sabo, Luffy, and Vivi looked up as the doors to the study flew open and Sanji ran inside. Usopp flinched and ducked his head, but Sanji pulled back his chair, yanked him to his feet, and grabbed him in a hug.

"Usopp, I'm so sorry," he said into his hair, oblivious to the eyes upon them.

"Huh?" was all Usopp could get out. He was too confused to even hug Sanji back.

Sanji pulled back with a huge smile. "I messed up, I was stupid, I'm sorry—Usopp, I love you, can you forgive me?"

Usopp's eyes widened. "You—what? Why?"

"Do I need to answer that? You're amazing, with or without that mask!"

Usopp looked to the guards and Vivi, who gave him "Told-you-so" gestures.

"Oh," he said at last, eyes watering as he turned back to Sanji. "But—why were we arrested?!"

"I was stupid," Sanji said again, hugging him, and this time Usopp hugged back, smiling. "I'll explain later. I'm so sorry."

"Of course I forgive you," Usopp said, shaking in relief.

Luffy and Vivi started applauding.

"Oh, Vivi?" Sanji added, looking at her over Usopp's shoulder. "Robin explained. I'm having that law about witches removed at once."

Vivi stood, nearly knocking her chair over. "Really?! Oh, Sire, thank you!" She clasped her hands in front of her with a big smile. "Nami would be so happy!"

"She was," Sanji agreed absentmindedly.

"Yeah, I bet," Usopp said with a grin.

A pause.

"Wait, how do you know Nami?" Usopp said, looking back at Vivi in confusion.

"What do you mean?" Vivi said. "I told you she—oh, I did not mention her name. That seems to be a problem with us, doesn't it? Nami was my friend I mentioned."

"Wait, wait, hold on," Usopp said. "See, that's really weird, because Nami told me almost the exact same story you did, except _her_ friend was called—"

" _Vivi?"_

Everyone in the study looked to the doors, where Robin stood aside to allow Nami to step in. She stared at Vivi, lip trembling and eyes wide in shock.

" _Nami?"_ Vivi whispered, covering her mouth, fingers shaking.

A moment's silence hung in the air before both women burst into tears and flew forward, only managing to not fall over from the force of which they knocked into each other by how tightly they held on.

"Oh, my gosh," Usopp exclaimed, laughing in delight. The guards and Sanji appeared confused but pleased for them, while Robin covered a happy smile with one hand.

"We have so much . . . to catch up on," Nami said at last, drawing her head back from Vivi's shoulder, but not letting go of her. Vivi could only nod through her tears, clutching Nami's torso like a lifeline.

"I'm glad this turned out well," Sanji said at last. "Once again, I apologize for . . . everything I did. My stupidity."

"Don't mention it," Sabo said.

"Oh, easy for you to say, you weren't affected by it," Nami hissed. Vivi couldn't help but laugh at this familiar display of temper.

"I'm glad it was you all along," Sanji added to Usopp, hugging him again. "Sogeking, I mean."

"Yeah," Usopp said. "Forget that. I never have to do that again. I can just be me, right? No more lies."

"No more lies," Sanji agreed.

Luffy frowned. "Hey, wait a second. If _you're_ Ace, and _you're_ Sabo," he said, pointing to his brothers in turn, "and _I'm_ Luffy . . . then who's guarding the door?"

"No one," Ace said. "I locked it. It's fine."

An enormous _BANG_ came from the entrance.

"Is someone trying to break in?" Vivi said in worry. She and Nami drew their wands, still holding each other.

Another _BANG_ met their ears. The guards jumped to their feet and Sanji let go of Usopp, turning to the doors with a frown.

"Go see what's going on," he ordered, but then a huge _CRACK_ was heard, and the storming of footsteps heading their direction.

"What the—?" Sanji exclaimed. Robin stepped aside as a crowd burst into the study: Franky, Chopper, Koala, Zoro, and Brook.

"We're here to rescue Usopp!" Chopper yelled, raising tiny fists. "Give him back!"

"Usopp, bro!" Franky exclaimed. "You're not hurt!"

"Get away from him!" Koala yelled, charging Sanji and seizing him, using an arm throw to slam him to the ground.

"He looks fine," Zoro pointed out, still standing by the door.

"Hey, hey, cut it out!" Luffy exclaimed, hurrying over to Koala with his brothers and grabbing her, holding her back. "King Sanji, you okay?"

"What's going on?" Sanji said weakly.

"We're getting Bro Usopp and sis outta here!" Franky exclaimed.

"But he looks fine," Brook said. He and Zoro hadn't moved from the doors. "I told you this was an exaggeration, Mr. Franky—"

"Koala, calm down, everything's fine," Sabo exclaimed. "Everything worked out!"

Nami and Vivi, startled by the sudden entrance, had hidden themselves behind a table.

" _Guys!"_ Usopp yelled, startling everyone into silence. "What the heck are you doing?!"

"We're here to rescue you!" Chopper exclaimed. "'Cause you didn't do anything to get arrested and Franky said we needed to save you!"

"Damn right!" Franky said firmly. "Now come on! Where's your housemate?"

"I'm not in trouble," Usopp said.

"What?"

Sanji struggled to his feet. "I arrested them by mistake," he explained weakly. "Everything's already taken care of. Now please leave me and my sweetheart alone."

Usopp's face flushed at the term, but he couldn't help smiling.

"Sweetheart?" Brook repeated after a moment.

"Oh, they finally worked that out," Zoro said in understanding.

The guards slowly released Koala, who sheepishly apologized to Sanji and stood by Sabo. Nami and Vivi peeked out from behind the table and came back up, still holding each other.

"The doors are . . . very much broken, Sire," Robin reported. She hadn't intervened in the fiasco at all.

"Right. Okay." Sanji brushed off his clothes and looked around at the intruders. "You're all under arrest."

* * *

After much protesting and pleading, Sanji allowed Zoro and Brook to go free, but detained Koala, Chopper, and Franky in a single room for the night, since Franky had organized the break-in, Koala and Chopper had been the ones who destroyed the doors, and Koala had thrown him to the floor a bit unfairly. Much to their disappointment, Sabo and Usopp were forbidden to visit them.

To the amazement of the others, Nami and Vivi easily fixed the broken doors with waves of their wands. Both appeared tired afterwards, but repairs had never been a taxing task in the world of magic. When it was brought up, Nami promptly admitted that she'd lied about her disguising spell containing a confidence boost, leaving Usopp indignant but a bit relieved.

Usopp nearly burst into tears when Sanji offered to let him and Nami join him in living at the palace. But while he accepted, Nami and Vivi shared a look before refusing, deciding instead to live in what was now Usopp's former residence. For that night, Usopp and Nami returned to their house and Vivi stayed at the palace, all three preparing for new living conditions.

The following afternoon, when the three invaders had been released and apologies were exchanged between them and Usopp—Nami welcomed Vivi into the house with open arms, and Usopp officially moved into the palace, where he was welcomed not only by Sanji, but by Robin, Ace, Sabo, and Luffy.

Usopp was given a bedroom near Sanji to stay in for the time being—"Until our wedding," Sanji said with a wink, at which Usopp promptly lost the ability to form coherent sentences. Though they occasionally complained that they missed Vivi, the guards were happy to have an addition to the palace family and frequently badgered Usopp for games.

Having officially quit his position in Koala's tavern, Usopp decided that Koala should have whatever revenue was to be gained from selling his final paintings. He continued to paint with those old supplies in the palace—not quite as often as he used to, but enough to occupy himself and impress the others.

Nami and Vivi, safe to reveal themselves as witches, started a home business of using magic to perform tasks for the town: Minor repairs of item or wound, cleaning, potions or temporary creations—the more complicated or exhausting a task, the higher price the customer would pay, and Franky would have joked about running out of customers had Nami or Vivi known the first thing about repairing vehicles and electronics.

And so, time marched on . . .


	10. Be Wherever You Are

_Three months later_

Once, twice, and thrice Usopp knocked upon the door before taking a step back to wait with Sabo. They watched in fascination as a periscope-like tube popped out from a hole in the wall and stared at them with a glass eye. A small metal piece briefly fell over the eye as if it was blinking before the tube retracted back into the hole. The door opened a moment later.

Usopp didn't even get a word out before Nami hugged him. He hugged her back and they let go, grinning.

"How are you?" he exclaimed, staring into the house behind her. It was far neater and prettier than when they had lived there.

"Oh, we are great," Nami said happily, waving to Sabo. She stepped aside to let them in as Vivi came around the corner. "The business is going so well!"

"Mr. Sabo, Mr. Usopp," Vivi exclaimed, smiling. "How are you all doing?"

"We're great," Sabo said with a grin. "You should come visit sometime, everyone misses you—what've you done to this place?"

"It's incredible what you can do with old scraps and magic wands," Nami said with a wink. She pushed aside curtains leading into the parlor and brought everyone in, disappearing for a moment into the kitchen and returning with small cups of warm tea, held aloft by her wand.

The cups floated to everyone and were caught before they crashed. Nami sat next to Vivi and looked between Usopp and Sabo.

"Is this just a friendly visit?" she asked, leaning forward. "Or is there a special reason?"

Usopp and Sabo grinned.

"I mean, I did want to visit," Usopp explained, sipping his tea. "Oh, this is good—um, since it's been a while. But we're also here to deliver some news."

"News about what?" Vivi prompted.

Usopp grinned. "Well . . ."

* * *

Usopp and Sabo now stood in front of Franky's and Chopper's shop. Usopp knocked on the wall.

"Welcome," Franky said, straightening up and turning around. "What can we—BRO!"

"Usopp!" Chopper cried, running forward and knocking Usopp over with the force of his hug.

"Where the hell have you been?!" Franky yelled, storming over with a huge grin. "You bastard, you should've visited!"

"I'm sorry!" Usopp exclaimed, sitting up with Chopper still clinging to his shoulders. "I've been busy—I missed you guys, too! Geez!"

Sabo helped Usopp stand again and Chopper finally hopped down.

"We actually came to deliver some news," Sabo explained, "and you would've found out in a few days, but . . . Usopp wanted to see everyone, so . . ."

"Don't act like you didn't come for no reason," Usopp muttered. Sabo looked away. "Anyway, yeah, we're going to the tavern after this—but I think we have some time. Should I tell a story first?"

Sabo glanced around impatiently while Chopper nodded with shining eyes.

"Man, I've missed those," Franky said, still grinning as he grabbed Usopp in a hug. "Go for it!"

Usopp sat on a table. "Okay! So, it all started with a dragon who had a penchant for kidnapping royalty . . ."

* * *

By the time the story ended, the sun was setting outside, and Sabo resembled Luffy with how much he was fidgeting.

"Oh, shoot, we should get going," Usopp exclaimed, looking outside. "Real quick, here's the news before we do—"

* * *

When Usopp and Sabo reached the tavern at last, Sabo was quick to walk in first, running to the near-empty counter and leaning over to hug Koala.

"Hi!" she exclaimed with a grin, pulling back as Usopp walked in. "How're— _Usopp!"_

She leapt the counter and ran to give him a quick hug as well.

"How's it going?" she exclaimed, looking between him and Sabo.

"It's been great, sorry I couldn't visit sooner—" Usopp glanced at Zoro and Brook. "Hi, guys!"

"Mr. Usopp, good to see you," Brook said with a broad smile. Zoro grinned and lifted his mug in greeting.

"How's everyone at the palace?" Koala asked, hopping back over the counter.

"They're good," Sabo said, sitting at the counter with Usopp. Usopp looked around at his old paintings on the wall as Sabo continued, "Luffy wanted to come, too, but then Ace needed help with carrying stuff, King Sanji's organizing things—" He shook his head. "Robin's been an amazing help. I get why she didn't tell us, but it would've been nice to know about that power sooner!"

"That weird limb thing?" Zoro said. Sabo had mentioned it on his last visit. "I can imagine."

"Mesdames Nami and Vivi sometimes visit here," Brook said, glancing at Usopp.

"Do they?" Usopp exclaimed.

"Oh, yes—only in the evenings, from what I've seen, I don't think they like crowds."

"Good for them," Usopp said, smiling. "Getting out in public, I mean. Oh! Guys, we came to deliver some news—"

Sabo grinned, folding his arms on the counter as Usopp continued, "I mean, you're gonna get a proper invitation in a few days, but I thought we should tell you first—me n' Sanji are getting married!"

Koala gasped, smiling, while Brook clasped his hands together and Zoro raised his mug in a toast.

"Congratulations," he said, throwing his head back for a drink. "Did you cry when he proposed?"

"Who says he proposed?" Usopp exclaimed. "Maybe it was me!"

Everyone looked at him.

"Okay, I cried," he admitted.

"When's the wedding?" Zoro asked.

"A week and a few days," Usopp explained, smiling, "and we're gonna take a trip the day after—"

"Does this make you official royalty?" Koala asked, wringing a towel expectantly.

Usopp's eyes widened. "Oh, oh my god, I didn't even think of that."

"You're marrying the _King_ and you didn't think of that?" Brook repeated.

"I just—I was only thinking of the _romance_ , not the _politics_ of it—oh, geez—"

"King Sanji was there before you, so you'll be second-in-command," Sabo explained. "I think, as his second, your title will be 'Prince.'"

Usopp stared at the ceiling, processing this.

"Wow," he said at last. "Is it . . . a lot of responsibility?"

"Worry about that later," Sabo said, clapping him on the back. He glanced up at Koala. "Um, what time does this place close again?"

Koala told him.

"Can we stay until then?"

* * *

When Usopp and Sabo returned to the palace, they were jumped on by Ace and Luffy, demanding to know how Vivi was doing. Once they'd gotten the news, they backed off, satisfied, and Robin and Sanji came around to greet them.

"We'll start preparing for the wedding in a few days," Sanji said happily. He looked around. "What do you think? Outside or inside?"

"Inside," Robin suggested. "The paper predicts rainfall starting in a few days."

"Is that so? Inside it is."

* * *

Days passed, and the wedding finally rolled around. Usopp licked his lips nervously, checking himself in the mirror.

"You look fine, don't worry."

He whipped around to see Robin standing behind him with a smile.

"Geez, you startled me," he muttered. He turned back to the mirror and adjusted his hair. "I just . . . what if I mess up? What if I trip, or I say the wrong words, or st-stutter—"

He gripped the sides of the mirror and twitched when a hand sprouted from his back, patting his shoulder.

"You'll be fine," Robin said firmly. She closed her eyes briefly and smiled. "If it's any consolation, your fiancé is nervous, too."

Usopp frowned at the mirror. "He is?"

"He keeps playing with his hair," Robin explained. "I'll go talk to him as well. The ceremony's starting soon, so come out in a minute."

She reached the door and paused, looking back.

"There's some dirt," she said, tapping her forehead. "Right there."

Usopp frantically scrubbed at the spot while she left.

* * *

"Oh—"  
"Oh, no—"

Usopp turned away, hiding his face. "We aren't supposed to see each other before the ceremony!" he exclaimed. "It's bad luck! Now things are gonna go horribly wrong—"

Sanji let out an exasperated sigh, turned Usopp around, and pulled his hands away.

"How're you feeling?" he asked.

Usopp dropped his hands, surrendering. "Stomach hurts," he whispered. "You?"

"Kinda itchy." Sanji tucked some hair behind his ear, only to tug it back out. "Um . . . we should go to our places."

"Right."

They turned and hurried away.

* * *

Walking down the aisle, Usopp's shoulders were stiff and his head held high. He was accompanied by Luffy, who kept looking out to the crowd and waving at friends, causing murmurs of laughter in the audience. Ace, Sabo, and Robin already stood at the altar with Sanji.

When they reached the altar, meeting with Sanji, Usopp took a second to look out at the crowd. He spotted Franky, Chopper, and Zoro right away—Brook was providing the music, of course, standing nearby with his violin—and there were Nami and Vivi, sitting nervously in the audience with expectant smiles. Koala sat near them, eyes darting between Sabo and the royal couple.

The preacher cleared his throat and waved to Brook. As the music stopped, Usopp finally looked at Sanji and saw the sea within his eyes (Sanji's hair was of course parted properly down the center for the occasion at Robin's insistence). A small, relaxed smile came to his face as they clasped hands and his nervous knee-knocking ceased.

He hardly heard all the proper ceremonious words from the preacher, and had only just registered "kiss" when Sanji leaned in, one hand holding the back of Usopp's head as he pressed their lips together. Usopp melted into it, forgetting how many eyes were upon them even as the audience stood and cheered.

"Let the reception begin!" Sanji called once he'd pulled back.

* * *

The resulting party lasted until sundown. Usopp first danced with Sanji, of course, and once everyone else joined in, they traded partners, Sanji offering dances to some women while Usopp joined in with Franky and Chopper. Sabo and Koala stayed together while Ace and Luffy threw things at them for fun (balled-up napkins, paper clips, bottle caps), and Nami and Vivi danced together, politely turning down Sanji's requests. Zoro seemed content to stay near the wall (and the punch bowl); Brook of course provided the music with accompaniment from a pianist, and Robin, wearing a sari, was dragged into the festivities by Usopp, Franky, and Chopper.

At last, well after sunset, the crowd began to dwindle. Goodbyes were said among Usopp and his friends, and Sabo had to make Koala leave when she started yawning.

Sabo and Luffy dragged Ace up to bed, and Sanji returned from talking with Brook, the final guest. As Brook left, Sanji said, "I'm probably going to hire him as the official musician. He said he doesn't care to live here, so he'd just show up at events like this."

"Everything's set up for your journey tomorrow," Robin said to him and Usopp with a smile. Her robe was a bit disheveled from the dancing she'd been pulled into, and the ties of the other two were rumpled.

"Excellent, thank you very much," Sanji said with a grateful smile. He and Usopp were to take a honeymoon the following day, and Robin would assume any minor tasks which Sanji would normally take care of.

"Unless there's anything else, I think I'll take an early bedtime," Robin said, holding back a yawn.

"No, I think that's it—thank you again, you're wonderful," Sanji said. Robin smiled and left the room.

"This can be taken care of tomorrow," Sanji added, looking around the messy room. "Oh, well. Are you ready for bed, too?"

Usopp nodded, yawning. "I can carry you," he said with a little grin. "Like I'm the hero, saving you from the evil dragon."

"Oh, please, if anything—" Sanji knelt and knocked Usopp's legs out from underneath him, making him yelp before Sanji caught him bridal-style— "I'll be the one saving you."

"It could happen," Usopp protested, leaning his head into Sanji's shoulder.

"Hm." Sanji started walking, careful about keeping his balance with such an imbalanced load. "Maybe if the dragon needs the best sharpshooter in the world to prove his skill."

"I _am_ a decent sniper!"

"I know you are. You caught Luffy the other day with a lasso, _while_ he was running, and he can _run."_

"The situation called for it. I couldn't let that villain get away with an entire ham."

"You're my hero, alright." Sanji shifted his grip as they approached stairs. "Okay, now get down, I'm not taking you up these things."

* * *

Changed into nightclothes, Usopp at last followed Sanji into his bedroom, planning to move his stuff from his previous room into this one as soon as possible.

He sat on the edge of the bed and looked around, and nearly fell off when he spotted something on the wall.

"Sanji," he said as Sanji went for the light. "Wait—that painting—"

"Do you like it?" Sanji asked with a cheeky smile, looking to the canvas on the wall. "I bought it from the best painter in the world."

It was, of course, the painting of the fish-filled ocean Sanji had bought from Usopp the first day they had met.

"You still have it," Usopp said in wonder. "And it's been— _here?"_

"Sure," Sanji said matter-of-factly. "That way I know I'll see it every day."

Usopp looked ready to cry.

"Come on," Sanji said, turning out the light. By the faint gleam of the window, he went to the bed and patted Usopp's shoulder. "You okay?"

"You're the best," Usopp whispered.

"You are, too."

They climbed under the covers and lay in silence. Sanji rested his head in the crook of Usopp's neck, and Usopp draped an arm over him.

"Usopp . . ."

"Mm?"

"I'm so happy. First thing I see tomorrow when I wake up is gonna be _you_."

Usopp ran his fingers through Sanji's hair. "Same here. I can't believe how lucky I am."

"You think _you're_ lucky?" Sanji shifted and sighed. "Hey . . ."

Usopp waited.

"Will you tell me a story?"

Usopp smiled. "Sure. Any requests?"

"Hm . . ."

Usopp heard the smile in his voice, too.

"Something . . . to do with the painting."

"Okay."

Usopp held him, feeling his breath on his chest, and his heart warmed. He ran his fingers through Sanji's hair again and took a deep breath.

"Once upon a time, there was a sea called the All Blue."

* * *

~Fin~

* * *

 **Story's done! Thanks for all your support, everyone!**


End file.
